IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph below gives information about Dubai gold sales in 2002.

The graph below gives information about Dubai gold sales in 2002.
The line graph below illustrates the changes
Dubai's
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in Dubai's
show examples
gold
Use synonyms
sales
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 during 2002.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 the
figures
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 fluctuated during the year before they levelled off in October. The highest figure was in March
while
Linking Words
 the lowest
gold
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sales
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 were in July and September. At the beginning of the year, the
figures
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 stood at 200
dirhams
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 in January and it slightly increased in February and reached roughly 225
dirhams
Use synonyms
. By
following
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, the
gold
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sales
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 rose dramatically and reached 350 in March. After that, there was a significant drop during four months from March to July and
figures
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 reached over 100
dirhams
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.
However
Linking Words
, in August the
gold
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sales
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 grew considerably approximately 200
while
Linking Words
 dropped remarkably in September and reached again over 100. In October the
figures
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 increased slightly and reached about 175
dirhams
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 after that, the
gold
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sales
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leveled
Change the spelling
levelled
show examples
 off in the
last
Linking Words
 two months and remained unchanged at roughly 200
dirhams
Use synonyms

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words gold, sales, figures, dirhams with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "roughly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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