In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?

이득 이 더 크다 In the modern era, with the developed medical system, there is a phenomenon that
people
tend to have longer lives in comparison to the past. With
this
trend, some
people
believe that
old
Fix the agreement mistake
older
show examples
generations
occur
Verb problem
experience
show examples
severe social issues
such
as pressure
on taking
Change preposition
to take
show examples
care of
them
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
through
social
Correct article usage
the social
show examples
security system which is run by
government
funding. In the meantime, other individuals insist that there are more significant advancements in society from older
people
. Proponents argue that having
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
more
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
aging
Change the spelling
ageing
show examples
people
would bring a variety of social issues in the community.
This
is fundamentally
due to
the fact that young
people
have
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
chagces
Correct your spelling
chances
in their career paths from getting a job to having a promotion to go to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
higher level of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
work if senior workers still remain
their
Change preposition
in their
show examples
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
rather than retiring.
Coupled with
this
, once
aged
Verb problem
apply
show examples
people
are retired
Wrong verb form
retire
show examples
from their work, they should still maintain their lives regardless if they can afford their living costs continuously without new income.
This
ends up
leading
Verb problem
putting
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
pressure
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
society
Change preposition
on society
show examples
to look after
poor
Correct article usage
the poor
show examples
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
eldetly
Correct your spelling
elderly
by
Change preposition
through
show examples
a
government
-based fund which will be a
berdon
Correct your spelling
burden
on
young
Correct article usage
the young
show examples
generation by contributing more taxes from their income.
This
has already been raised in many developed nations
such
as South Korea and Japan as one of the social issues that they should deal with.
Nonetheless
, the
aformentioned
Correct your spelling
aforementioned
viewpoint can be considered
plasiable
Correct your spelling
plausible
playable
, there are other
people
advocating that aged individuals put
their
Change preposition
in their
show examples
effort and contributions as they have much more
expriences
Correct your spelling
experiences
experience
in their personal and professional lives compared to younger
people
. A salient example of
this
would be described as
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the older generation can transfer their
experties
Correct your spelling
expertise
to the young generation with their
resouces
Correct your spelling
resources
and
kwowledge
Correct your spelling
knowledge
. More specifically, in the medicine and healthcare sector, senior doctors give junior medical workers the
micro skills
Add a hyphen
micro-skills
show examples
of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
surgury
Correct your spelling
surgery
and treatment and how to build
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
rapport with patients.
This
can
also
broadly be happened in the other fields to teach new workers. More importantly, older
people
with more
experiences
Fix the agreement mistake
experience
show examples
can support
to build
Change the verb form
building
show examples
up the new system at the
government
level by involving the
government
's new action
planor
Correct your spelling
plan or
planner
regulartory
Correct your spelling
regulatory
policies to make society secure for younger
people
. In conclusion,
although
having more
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
older
people
can lead
Change preposition
to relavent
show examples
relavent
Correct your spelling
relevant
social
issuse
Correct your spelling
issues
issue
social a more
borden
Correct your spelling
burden
on
government
based on taxes from
younger
Add an article
the younger
show examples
populace, I personally put my endorsement on that the advantages of older individuals can outweigh the demerits when it comes to personal and
prefessional
Correct your spelling
professional
experiences.
Submitted by yeseulyou92 on

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Introduction and Conclusion
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Task Response
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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

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  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

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  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ageing population
  • benefits
  • disadvantages
  • advantages
  • experience
  • knowledge
  • contribution
  • economy
  • society
  • healthcare
  • youth employment
  • community
  • intergenerational support
  • volunteerism
  • mentorship
  • increased demand
  • pension costs
  • social welfare systems
  • workforce
  • productivity
  • intergenerational conflict
  • technological adaptability
  • dependency
  • effective
  • skill development
  • employment opportunities
  • intergenerational solidarity
  • communication
  • lifelong learning
  • technological literacy
  • age-friendly
  • social policies
  • infrastructure
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