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Writing Samples
Band 5

A rise in the standard of living in a country often only seems to benefit cities rather than rural areas. What problems might these differences cause? How might these problems be reduced?

#rise #country #benefit #cities #areas #differences
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It has been observed that
a
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an
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 increase in
level
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the level
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 of living in a state always only seems to advantage cities
instead
 of
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
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.
This
 essay will explore the various factors that contribute to
this
 trend, followed by some possible solutions to solve
this
 problem. A plausible interpretation for the phenomenon development that
tha
Correct your spelling
has
 occurred in recent decades. As the economy flourishes, people living in urban areas have access to
wide
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a wide
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 range of job opportunities, that they can select and acquire. One crucial factor is that the government has performed poorly. The government failed to provide proper guidance and service functions, but only imposed rigid administrative restrictions on education, health care,etc.
This
 has resulted in a huge gap between the outcomes and expectations, and people’s
behavior
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behaviour
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 has not shifted in the right direction.
Consequently
, many people in rural districts still do not know
ho
Correct your spelling
how
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 to improve their living standards. Fortunately, there are some measures we can take to enhance
this
 alarming situation. One of the possible solutions to
this
 problem is to change faraway people’s mindsets. They should not be constrained by their habits and old ideas, but rather should bravely and positively face a new life. By doing so, they can enjoy a higher level of living welfare,
such
 as medical services. Another
psssible
Correct your spelling
possible
 solution to
this
 problem is to improve the government’s regulations of management
remote
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of remote
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 areas, especially the supervision of educational level and habits of life. In summary, my argument is that cities and rural
regions
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regions'
region's
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 unbalanced development can readily trigger many issues, but in
general
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general,
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 there are many viable solutions that people can adopt to prevent these issues from occurring.
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coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, consider employing a wider range of linking words and phrases to show the relationships between ideas more clearly. Additionally, organizing paragraphs in a more logical way that smoothly transitions from one to the next will improve readability and the overall flow of your essay.
task achievement
For a higher score in task achievement, make sure your essay fully addresses all parts of the prompt. Include more detailed examples and explanations in your body paragraphs to support your arguments. This will demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic and provide a more comprehensive response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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