In some parts of the world traditional festivals and celebrations have dissapeared or are disappearing. What problem is this causing? What measures could be taken to counter this solution?
The tendency in
world
to not celebrate specific days is making us live like each other with no differences. In order to solve Add an article
the world
this
problem, the governments may want to protect the social and historical impacts of their subjects and the youth should be informed about certain beliefs and customs in their country.
The main problem caused by this
situation is we all started to live like the same, with no different patterns and consequently
, the historical and cultural treasure
of the world are disappearing Fix the agreement mistake
treasures
due to
this
extinction of celebrations. We now are rather too lazy to show our respects to any cultural customs and everyone is too busy to live their own individual life. To illustrate, not celebrating any special occasion and living that day
as a regular day
makes us a strager
, just as someone who has no idea about that Correct your spelling
stranger
stronger
day
and we both become outsiders to it and as a result
, we both become like each other.
To solve this
issue, mothers and fathers should educate their offsprings
about the importance of the specific Fix the agreement mistake
offspring
day
, doing some creative activities with children
or throwing certain parties may give this
education to them. Another solution can be held by governments and certain entities, namely preserving the cultrual
impacts by organising events for both Correct your spelling
cultural
children
and adults. This
prevents cultural history from fainting day
by day
and us from thinking, living and knowing like the same. For instance
, in Turkey, the 23rd of April is the
National Correct article usage
apply
Children
's Day
, in the past
we were all excited about the Add a comma
past,
day
as youngsters,
because the government was encouraging everyone to celebrate that Remove the comma
apply
day
, however
the government now has other priorities on their agenda and today the National Add the comma(s)
however,
Children
's Days have become just as regular days.
In conclusion, the problem of human beings living like their clones in terms of culture,
can be solved in two ways: with the efforts of the families Remove the comma
apply
about educating
their Change preposition
to educate
children
about their nation and with certain governmental strategies which are able to excite the citizens about the importance of the special day
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task achievement
Make sure to address the essay prompt directly and thoroughly. In this case, more specific examples and detailed discussion on the impacts and solutions would enhance your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Work on developing a more cohesive structure by using a wider range of linking words and phrases. This will help guide the reader through your essay more smoothly.
task achievement
Provide more specific and varied examples to support your points. Detailed examples add depth to your essay and demonstrate a stronger understanding of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Consider separating ideas into more paragraphs. Each main idea should start a new paragraph, which helps in organizing the essay better and making it easier to follow.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite