IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The charts below how global water resources are distributed

#water #resources
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The charts show how global
water
Use synonyms
 resources are distributed.
Overall
Linking Words
, there are two sources of
water
Use synonyms
 in the world, which are oceans and freshwater. The distribution of those precious resources
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
also
Linking Words
 unequal across the world. Worldwide, the supply of
water
Use synonyms
 from oceans accounts for 97% of the total supply, and just an extremely diminutive percentage of the supply, 3%, is fresh
water
Use synonyms
. Freshwater itself is
further
Linking Words
 classified
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 glaciers and ice caps,
ground
Correct your spelling
groundwater
show examples
water
Use synonyms
, and renewable freshwater from lakes, rivers, and surface
fresh
Correct your spelling
freshwater
show examples
water
Use synonyms
. Respectively, each source holds 68.70%, 30.10%, and 1.20% of freshwater supply. The already limited freshwater supply is
also
Linking Words
 spread unevenly across the globe.
For example
Linking Words
, South America holds the largest renewable freshwater supply in the world, with more than 15,000 km3
reservoir
Fix the agreement mistake
reservoirs
show examples
 within the region. Other regions are not so lucky – Oceania, namely, only has access to 1,000 km3
renewable
Change preposition
of renewable
show examples
 freshwater.
Overall
Linking Words
, the limited and uneven supply of
freshwater
Correct your spelling
fresh water
show examples
 is a reminder for us to avoid wasting
water
Use synonyms
.
Water
Use synonyms
 is an extremely precious resource and not everyone has access to renewable freshwater.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
To improve your Task Achievement score, ensure that your essay directly addresses every aspect of the task. Consider incorporating a comparative analysis of the charts to offer a more nuanced understanding of global water distribution.
Task Achievement
To enhance the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas, try to elaborate more on why the unequal distribution of freshwater is significant and how it impacts different regions differently. This will make your argument more compelling and comprehensive.
Coherence and Cohesion
For better Coherence and Cohesion, work on creating more explicit connections between your paragraphs. Use a variety of linking words and phrases to help the reader follow the logical flow of your essay more easily.
Coherence and Cohesion
Try to include a clearer introduction and conclusion to mark the beginning and end of your argument clearly. This will help provide a more rounded and complete response to the task.
Coherence and Cohesion
To bolster the supported main points, ensure that each point you make is backed by specific data or examples from the charts. This strengthens your argument and demonstrates a detailed understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: