Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
In nowadays modern society,
people
use a wide range of social media
to contact with
other Change preposition
apply
people
and collect social problem events. The writer of this
essay believes that despite possible people
's addiction it does not outweigh the benefits of obtaining information
from the internet
.
The most important factor of
using social Change preposition
in
media
is how convenient it is . Some people
who are away from home, can't prevent them from missing their parents or their family. Instead
of the usual function of calling and texting, now people
can use social media
to see
Verb problem
apply
the
capture Correct article usage
apply
of
their daily routine, it Change preposition
apply
also
combines calling with the camera so they can talk to them in person. Moreover
, users can follow their idol
or the news Fix the agreement mistake
idols
is
happening.
Another factor is that the Correct pronoun usage
that is
information
people
receive on the internet
is reliable and trusted. People
must know where the official government channel to receive information
. Therefore
, users can gain the social problem to tackle with it. For instance
, Bao Moi
Change noun form
Moi's
appillication
Correct your spelling
application
applications
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
the
reliable Correct article usage
apply
soursce
that Correct your spelling
source
sources
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
people
must know in society. Thus
, collecting from social network
is Fix the agreement mistake
networks
usefull
for many Correct your spelling
useful
people
, so it developes
Correct your spelling
develops
developed
cognitive
to Correct article usage
the cognitive
faces
Wrong verb form
face
with
many challenges.
Change preposition
apply
However
, both things have two edges, many users aren't wise enough to filter the real information
. Moreover
, some types of sources contain information
is
offensive, harassing or bullying on the Correct pronoun usage
that is
internet
, so people
can be deterred from illegal actions on the internet
. Therefore
, young people
can stuck in bad habits while
in the formation process. For instance
, when scrolling social media
, people
easily find posts that teach tricks but somehow it is not verified, people
therefore
imitate the bad things. Hence
, copying the bad action Correct your spelling
from
form
the social networking site Correct your spelling
from
affect
the way Correct subject-verb agreement
affects
people
acting
In conclusion, using social Wrong verb form
act
media
in the right way requires lots of skills, people
must be wiser to aware
of bad Add a missing verb
be aware
information
. Although
being old in this
modern world gives older people
great chances to access a better life, it also
creates concerns about resources.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure all paragraphs follow a clear logical structure, starting with a topic sentence followed by explanation, example, and a concluding sentence. This helps improve clarity and argument strength.
Coherence & Cohesion
Provide clearer introductions and conclusions. The introduction should more explicitly state the advantages and disadvantages to be discussed, while the conclusion should succinctly restate the key points and your position.
Task Achievement
Back up your main points with more detailed, specific examples. General statements are less convincing than examples that clearly illustrate how social media impacts individuals or society.
Task Achievement
Work on providing a more complete response to the task. Make sure to address the question directly in both the introduction and conclusion. Clearly weigh the advantages against the disadvantages to make your stance more evident.
Coherence & Cohesion
Review the essay for grammar and vocabulary accuracy. Avoid repetition and strive for varied sentence structures and a wider range of vocabulary. This not only enhances readability but also demonstrates language proficiency.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example