The government should spend money in promoting sport and art in school, rather than sponsoring sports and art events in communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#government #money #sport #art #school #sports #events #communities

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While

some people believe that

authority

Fix the agreement mistake

authorities

show examples

should provide financial

support

schools

to promote

arts

and

sports

, others argue that it is better to focus on

arts

and

sports

events in communities. I completely agree with former opinion as amples of reasons are present to substantiate it. First and foremost, one of the obvious reasons for

goverments

Correct your spelling

governments

government

should provide financial

support

to academic institutions for the development of

arts

and

sports

is to fortify

innate

Correct article usage

the innate

show examples

abilities of juveniles.

In other words

, young ones' latent talents should be identified and provided adequate training at

early

Add an article

an early

show examples

age. To exemplify, renowned Indian

criket

Correct your spelling

cricket

player Sachin Tendulker's latent talent was identified by the

sports

teacher in the school and provided

support

for his career development.

Similarly

, several

schools

would not have sufficient

fund

Fix the agreement mistake

funds

show examples

to purchase equipment and supplies for the

arts

and

sports

sections,

therefore

, government

support

is imperative.

Furthermore

, providing financial

support

for

schools

will

enables

Wrong verb form

enable

show examples

more job

opportunites

Correct your spelling

opportunities

Change the punctuation

show examples

In detail, the

govenment

Correct your spelling

government

support

commense

Correct your spelling

commence

for

sports

Correct article usage

the sports

show examples

and craft section in

schools

required

Wrong verb form

requires

show examples

skilled teachers which will provide job opportunities for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people who are interested in

arts

and

sports

Besides

, nowadays young people are in the clutches of

Correct article usage

a sedentery

show examples

sedentery

Correct your spelling

sedentary

lifestyle.

As a result

, obesity and lifestyle diseases are prevalent among

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

population. Promoting

sports

at school would help to tackle

this

issue

Change preposition

show examples

a great

extend

Replace the word

extent

show examples

Moreover

, learning

craft

Fix the agreement mistake

crafts

show examples

and

arts

would

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

help juveniles

Verb problem

apply

show examples

releave

Correct your spelling

relieve

release

from mental stress caused by

Correct article usage

a competative

show examples

competative

Correct your spelling

competitive

academic system. In conclusion, providing financial

support

schools

not only

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

to identify latent talents but

also

enable

Correct subject-verb agreement

enables

show examples

more job opportunities.

Arts

and

sports

in school would promote

healthy

Add an article

a healthy

show examples

lifestyle as well. Ergo, I believe that financial

aids

Fix the agreement mistake

aid

show examples

should be provided to academic institutions

Submitted by ck.manshad on Wed Mar 20 2024

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Grammar and Vocabulary

Be mindful of spelling and grammatical errors, for instance, "amples" should be "ample", "goverments" should be "governments", and "juveniles" over "young ones" for consistency. Regularly proofreading can help identify and rectify these mistakes.

Coherence and Cohesion

Enhance the clarity of your arguments by structuring paragraphs around a single main idea. Begin with a clear topic sentence, follow up with explanations, examples, and conclude with a summary sentence that relates back to your overall essay point.

Task Response

You've done well in providing relevant examples to support your viewpoints. To further strengthen your essay, delve deeper into the implications and benefits. For instance, when citing Sachin Tendulkar's example, briefly discuss the broader impact of early talent identification in sports.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

287 words

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The government should spend money in promoting sport and art in school, rather than sponsoring sports and art events in communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think the typical teaching of a teacher and students in the class will not exist by the year 2050. Do you agree or disagree?

In most countries, prison is the most common solution when people commit a crime. However, if they were to receive better education, it could prevent them from becoming criminals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that children should aim to their best at what they are doing while others believe it is not necessary for them. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Some people believe that education is important to get jobs while others believe it its experience and skills. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some think that residents should responsible for keeping their areas clean and tidy, while others say it is the government’s responsibility. Discuss both views and state your own opinion.