Some individuals think that schoolchildren should participate in the additional
classes
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organized
Body paragraph 1
by institutions for more knowledge and
develop
Fix the infinitive
to develop
show examples
time
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-management skills.
According to
Linking Words
them,
Body paragraph 2
joining these extra
classes
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helps children obtain more information and reduces the chances of
Body paragraph 3
wasting their
time
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on electronic devices
such
Linking Words
as PlayStations and Smartphones.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, others argue that extra
classes
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have a negative impact on the lives of students
Body paragraph 4
because they do not get enough
time
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to grow their physical skills and put all their energies into
Body paragraph 5
studies. By doing so, they are becoming physically weak and emotionally sick. These people think
Body paragraph 6
that
in addition
Linking Words
to the normal
classes
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, children should have adequate
time
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to build psychological
Body paragraph 7
as well as
Linking Words
physical strength.In my opinion, the regular schedule of school is good enough to gain knowledge from books and the
Body paragraph 8
rest
time
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should be given to students for their interests.
Hence
Linking Words
, they would be able to enjoy their
Conclusion
childhood and grow
wel
Correct your spelling
well
bhardwajkomal136
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task achievement
Although you clearly attempt to address the topic, the essay lacks a conclusive paragraph. A clear conclusion strengthens your argument and summarises your opinion, reinforcing the essay's main points.
coherence and cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on organizing your essay more logically. This includes a clear introduction, body paragraphs that explore specific viewpoints with examples, and a strong conclusion. Transitional phrases can help link these sections smoothly.
task achievement
Expand your discussion with more relevant, specific examples to support each viewpoint. This not only demonstrates your understanding but also enhances the persuasiveness of your argument.
task achievement
Ensure your essay is fully developed by addressing all parts of the task. This includes discussing both views comprehensively and providing a clear personal opinion. The essay feels incomplete and would benefit greatly from further development and detail.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Some educational professionals believe that creative arts-based modules must be included in the secondary college syllabus. But others argue that the secondary school curriculum is only bound to academically valued studies. Albeit there is a dichotomy of views on this concern, I harbour the belief that this apprehension is totally warranted. But it should beg for some sort of exemplification and justification.
Some claim that it is more beneficial to purchase less. I strongly agree with this assumption because hardly anyone can anticipate what will happen in the future, and an extravagant lifestyle can cause far more difficulties, especially when catastrophes are besetting the world.
Language is a key to communication. Nowadays, due to the development in tourism, English is considered the most famous language and some section of society believe that if that continues only English will be the spoken language worldwide. I personally consider this to have both negative and positive effects on society which will be outlined in the following paragraphs.
In the present climate, visiting tourist attractions with demanding conditions has become a ubiquitous trend. Although there are plenty of drawbacks linked to this trend, I believe that its merits such as seeing natural beauties and learning new skills overshadow the cons.
Studying abroad is getting more and more popular in the modern world. Students will be able to explore the world and will have more opportunities . I am going to explain why candidates choose to learn outside of their motherland.