With increasing populations and ever growing urban centres, many countries their natural beauty spots. What benefits are there to protecting places of natural beauty? How can this be solved?

Nowadays, humanity has to face overpopulation and urbanisation of rural areas, which lead to the vanishing of natural
beauty
spots, because when choosing between some fast income and the heritage of
nature
, construction companies always choose money. The loss of natural attractions is considered a tremendous issue,
nevertheless
, some steps can be taken to fix
this
problem.
Firstly
, a lot of tourists choose their destinations for their next journeys depending on the variety of natural attractions,
thus
the country with untouched
nature
has better chances to get more travellers which eventually can help in developing its economy.
For example
, in Russia , Lake Baikal is a unique highly protected natural
beauty
spot and thousands of tourists visit
this
place every year bringing a substantial sum of money to the region’s budget.
Secondly
, the
beauty
of
nature
should be kept for being left as a legacy to the next generation of citizens to make them proud of their homeland. Undoubtedly, people have a sense of One way to tackle
this
issue is that
Correct article usage
the
show examples
government should create special restrictions for construction companies to protect the natural spots of
beauty
from being destroyed for the sake of real estate development.
This
law must be strict enough and the penalty must be huge and inevitable,
hence
it can stop dishonest developers and preserve
nature
. Another way to cope with
this
issue is the creation of national parks in places of natural
beauty
. Usually, the visiting of national parks is popular among
nature
lovers, so
due to
its popularity, the national park cannot be built up secretly without attracting the attention of society.
To sum up
, it is evident that there are some benefits of protecting laces of
natuaral
Correct your spelling
natural
beauty
, and these places should be protected by law and
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
should create more national parks to ensure they are preserved.
Submitted by s_syedy on

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task response
Be cautious with the usage of complex sentences to ensure clarity. While complex structures showcase language proficiency, they must not compromise the essay's readability.
task response
Pay closer attention to spelling and punctuation. Typographical errors like 'laces of natuaral beauty' disrupt the flow and can slightly detract from the essay's overall quality.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear progression of ideas through the usage of linking words and appropriate paragraph structuring. While the essay demonstrates a good degree of coherence, further refinement in transitions could enhance its readability.
coherence cohesion
Consider a more varied use of cohesive devices to link ideas within and across paragraphs more smoothly. Good use has been made, but experimenting with a wider range can demonstrate greater command of the language.
coherence cohesion
Endeavor to introduce and conclude your essay more decisively. The introduction and conclusion are present and perform their roles, but sharper statements could provide a stronger framing for the essay.

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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