In many professional sports, there is an increase in the numbers of athletes using banned substances to improve their performance. What are the causes of the phenomenon and what are some of the possible solutions.

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In the modern era,

consumption

Correct article usage

the consumption

show examples

of harmful

products

Use synonyms

for increasing capabilities is one of the major problems in

Use synonyms

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

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. There are numerous reasons why it is done which I'm going to explain more about in the rest of

this

Linking Words

essay.

To begin

Linking Words

with, many factors entice athletes into consumption of injurious

products

Use synonyms

. The environment of

sport

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is getting more competitive and requires a lot of effort to gain a reputation. So, some individuals want to skip the effort part and acquire a reputation earlier and

hence

Linking Words

, they use these

products

Use synonyms

Additionally

Linking Words

, social media and its users have doubled the pressure on athletes by advocating for renowned individuals.

Therefore

Linking Words

, some people want to be the

one

Correct pronoun usage

ones

show examples

who

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

prouded by his/her peers and families and opt

these

Change preposition

for these

show examples

illegal ways which are very dangerous and usually jeopardize their lives.

For example

Linking Words

, In 2021, a Brazilian bodybuilder died because of consuming a lot of medicine to get fit. There are abundant ways to tackle

this

Linking Words

problem.

Firstly

Linking Words

, manufacturers and

distributers

Correct your spelling

distributors

show examples

of these

products

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should be arrested and put in jail for a

lot

Correct your spelling

long

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time until they regret what they have done.

Secondly

Linking Words

, the government should adopt highly stringent laws about these banned substances and even arrest athletes who use them because of injustice in competitions. FIFA,

for instance

Linking Words

, suspends any person who

use

Change the verb form

uses

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forbidden

susbtances

Correct your spelling

substances

up to 20 years from any activity in football.

Finally

Linking Words

, healthy

Use synonyms

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

have to be touted

amid

Change preposition

among

show examples

disparate groups of society

epecifically

Correct your spelling

specifically

the youth to combat harmful

products

Use synonyms

To conclude

Linking Words

world

Add an article

the world

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can not address the problem of injurious

products

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sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

unless people and governments cooperate and utilize the solutions that were mentioned.

yasinkooshki13866Thu Mar 21 2024

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task achievement

Ensure the introduction clearly outlines the essay structure and directly addresses both causes and possible solutions to the phenomenon

task achievement

Substantiate each point with more detailed examples or evidence to make your arguments stronger

coherence and cohesion

Work on connecting your ideas more seamlessly, using transition words or phrases to guide the reader through your argument

task achievement

Try to avoid generalizations and ensure that examples are directly relevant to the point being made. This will make your essay more compelling and persuasive.

coherence and cohesion

Revisit the conclusion to ensure it summarises the main points of your essay and reflects back on the question, offering a final thought or resolution

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

275 words

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In many professional sports, there is an increase in the numbers of athletes using banned substances to improve their performance. What are the causes of the phenomenon and what are some of the possible solutions.

Your opinion

Some people think all lawbreakers should be sent to prison, while others think there are better alternatives for those whose crimes are minor, such as making they do work for the local community. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Nowadays children watch much more television than they did in the past and spend less time on active or creative things. What are the reasons? And what measures should be taken to encourage children to spend more time on active or creative things?

In today's world many people own a smartphone. Do you think the ad vanatges of owning a smartphone putweigh the disadvantages

Many people today find they have insufficient time to spend with their families, because of pressures of work. What problems does this create for individuals and their families? What solutions can you propose? Which would be the most effective solution, in your view?