IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowadays, distant-learning programs have gained in popularity, but some people argue that online courses can never be as good as those taken at a college or university in person. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In the modern era, it is generally acknowledged that homeschooling is popular for
students
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. Concerning
this
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 issue, some
people
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 are of the opinion that learning
by
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apply
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online is not good for a student's education improvement. I only partly endorse
this
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 view as I believe there are some alternative ways. There are some noteworthy reasons why some
people
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 think that online courses are one of the best ways to
study
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. The most remarkable one is that going to school is not easy for some
students
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such
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 as disabled, and working
students
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 for their personal reasons.
For instance
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, most
students
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 couldn't go to school when Covid-19 was hit our country.
After
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this
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 season, our
distance-learning
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distance learning
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was
Verb problem
became
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 more popular and we made diverse apps for
study
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 including
zooms
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Zoom
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, and online attendance systems.
On the other hand
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, there are some
people
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 who disagree with homeschooling. These pessimists believe that whenever
students
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study
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 through electronic devices, they can not make close rapport and communicate with other members of society
such
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 as teachers and friends. Another eye-catching feature is that electronic devices
such
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 as tablets and laptops, especially the internet connection will have a lot of obstacles to interrupt their
study
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.
Due to
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 these reasons, whenever distance-learning programs are practised, most student’s
study
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 skills decrease.
In addition
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,
student’s
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students
student
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 can not solve their
study
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 problems well and teachers can not give feedback to each student. In a nutshell, after considering the relevance and importance of information, I partly agree that some
students
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undergo
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apply
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study
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through
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apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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online is necessary for a few
people
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 and specific situations but, there are more negative effects on
student’s
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students’
show examples
 growth.

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Coherence & Cohesion
To improve the logical structure of your essay, try to create a clearer roadmap in your introduction. This will help guide your reader through your arguments and make your essay more cohesive. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph flows logically to the next, using transitional phrases where necessary.
Coherence & Cohesion
Including an introduction and a conclusion is good practice, but try to make your introduction more engaging and your conclusion more conclusive. The introduction should clearly state your stance, and the conclusion should succinctly summarize your arguments and restate your stance, solidifying your position on the topic.
Coherence & Cohesion
To better support your main points, aim to include more detailed examples and evidence. This adds depth to your arguments and makes your essay more persuasive. Make sure that each main point is clearly stated and directly supported by relevant examples or data.
Task Achievement
Your response does address the task sufficiently, but to achieve a higher score, ensure that your ideas are not only comprehensive but also clearly and concisely expressed. Aim for a balanced discussion that adequately covers all aspects of the question.
Task Achievement
You've used relevant examples, which is good. To enhance your essay further, try to incorporate specific, detailed examples that closely relate to your main points. This specificity adds credibility to your argument and demonstrates a deeper understanding of the topic.
Task Achievement
While you present clear ideas, work on the clarity and precision of your expression. Avoid overly complex or confusing sentence structures. Simple, clear sentences often make the strongest impact. Review your work for any grammatical or spelling errors that could obscure your meaning.
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