Some people say that too much attention and too many resources are given in the protection of wild animals and birds Do you agree or disagree about this opinion?

Some
people
say that too much attention and too many
resource
Change to a plural noun
resources
show examples
are given
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
the protection of wild
animals
and birds. It is a global problem in the world or a lot of countries and Uzbekistan too. In our own country created
"red
Correct article usage
a "red
show examples
book" and
this
book
write
Correct subject-verb agreement
writes
show examples
down a lot of extinct
species
and flowers too. Than
meaning
Wrong verb form
means
show examples
this
"red book" is the red symbol of
dangerous
Replace the word
danger
show examples
. The
governments
create a punishment for
people
. Because pouches are hunting
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
extinct
species
and they
declane
Correct your spelling
decline
declare
species
too. But
governments
create special areas named barns for
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
animals
To begin
with
Add a comma
with,
show examples
I totally
agree
Add the preposition
agree on
agree to
agree with
show examples
this
opinion.
Forthermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
this
Change the determiner
this animal
these animals
show examples
animals
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
part of life and they have a special mission too. Because they are
chain
Add an article
a chain
show examples
of nature,if the
animals
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
declane
Correct your spelling
decline
have
a
Change the article
the
show examples
biggest problems in our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
For example
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
wolfs
Replace the word
wolves
show examples
are hygienic
animals
, since they clean the rest of
died
Verb problem
the dead
show examples
animals
in the forest.
Than
Correct your spelling
Then
show examples
the birds-they can help clean a
lot
Add the preposition
lot of
show examples
gardens or crops from dangerous insects like grasshoppers, dragonflies and seagulls too. The cats are important too, in view of the fact that the
governments
recommend
pet
Wrong verb form
petting
show examples
the cat and when you feel nervous,
this
process can
halp
Correct your spelling
help
for your nervous system. After
Rephrase
all the
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
dogs are loyal
animal
Fix the agreement mistake
animals
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
people
too. Because they defend our home or flat from crimes.
Than
Replace the word
Then
show examples
they protect our home when we
do
Verb problem
are
show examples
not here In conclusion,we would protect our
animals
.
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
the
governments
will strong protection and pay attention
too
Correct your spelling
to
show examples
, than increase
this
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
statics of the extinct
species
. The
people
save their domestic
animals
too. We
gonna
Wrong verb form
are going to
show examples
save our big and
honor
Replace the word
honourable
show examples
nature from bad things or pressures.
The nature
Correct article usage
Nature
show examples
is the main part
our
Change preposition
of our
show examples
life.
Submitted by Shaxnoza on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
Ensure that your introduction clearly states your opinion on the given topic. It’s essential to directly address the prompt by mentioning if you agree or disagree and why, in a succinct manner.
Task Achievement
Expand on your examples by elaborating on how each animal plays a crucial role in the ecosystem. This will help make your main points more compelling and relevant to the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
Organize your essay into clear paragraphs, each centered around a single main idea. This includes having a distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This structure helps in enhancing the logical flow of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to connect ideas within and between paragraphs. This contributes to the overall coherence of the essay and helps the reader follow your argument more easily. Examples include: 'Moreover', 'In addition', 'For instance', 'Consequently', etc.
General
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy and the range of vocabulary used. Avoid repetition of words and phrases, and try to use a variety of expressions to make your essay more engaging and dynamic.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • ecological balance
  • species extinction
  • wildlife conservation
  • sustainable development
  • ecosystem services
  • habitat destruction
  • endangered species
  • conservation efforts
  • natural heritage
  • human encroachment
  • poaching
  • genetic diversity
  • climate change
  • environmental stewardship
  • protection measures
  • wildlife sanctuary
  • biological significance
  • conservation biology
  • environmental advocacy
What to do next:
Look at other essays: