The willingness to take risks is the only way one can succeed in life, both personally and professionally. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#willingness #risks #life

this

time and age it is

will

Correct your spelling

well

show examples

known that the way to glory and

succese

Correct your spelling

success

is not covered with roses, and

Correct pronoun usage

you

show examples

need to take risks to reach your dream in

this

world. I do agree that we as individuals need to

make

Correct your spelling

take

show examples

calculated

risk

Fix the agreement mistake

risks

show examples

to get what we want out of life, but keep in mind that there

are

Change the verb form

show examples

a chance

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show examples

failing even if we try hard.

Fourtune

Correct your spelling

Fortune

favor

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favour

show examples

the brave

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

is what

had

Wrong verb form

has

show examples

been said for centuries, succese is

mix

Add an article

a mix

show examples

of hard work and the courage to take

Add an article

the risk

a risk

show examples

risk

Fix the agreement mistake

risks

show examples

while

others

are hesitate

Change the verb form

hesitate

show examples

to make the first move.

For example

, the founder of

Add an article

the soft

show examples

soft bank

Correct your spelling

Soft Bank

show examples

was one of

few

Correct article usage

the few

show examples

investers

Correct your spelling

investors

who

invest

Wrong verb form

invested

show examples

in tech

start up

Correct your spelling

start-ups

show examples

Change the pronoun

its

show examples

early

stage

Fix the agreement mistake

stages

show examples

. As

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a result

show examples

result

Add a comma

result,

show examples

he become

billioner

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a billioner

show examples

before the age of

50s

Correct your spelling

On the other hand

Change preposition

apply

show examples

being

risk

Correct article usage

a risk

show examples

taker will help the person to build personality

quailty

Correct your spelling

quality

that are

neccesary

Correct your spelling

necessary

for success.

For instance

, many young CEO who have

successfull

Correct your spelling

successful

successfully

start

Fix the agreement mistake

starts

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

are

risk

taker

Fix the agreement mistake

takers

show examples

, many of them drop out of university, to start

there

Correct your spelling

their

show examples

own

comany

Correct your spelling

company

which by the way are new and

high

Add a hyphen

high-risk

show examples

risk

industry.

addition

Add a comma

addition,

show examples

they had

develop

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developed

show examples

set

Add an article

a set

show examples

of character to survive the challenges they

face

Wrong verb form

faced

show examples

this

environment, they

learn

Wrong verb form

learned

show examples

to build

self confident

Correct your spelling

self-confidence

show examples

that

help

Wrong verb form

helped

show examples

them to lead

there

Correct your spelling

their

show examples

team, strong stamina in difficult times, and make quick

decision

Fix the agreement mistake

decisions

show examples

Therefore

taking

risk

Fix the agreement mistake

risks

show examples

grow

Correct subject-verb agreement

grows

show examples

strong

mentailty

Correct your spelling

mentality

mentally

and character which leads

at the end

to success. In conclusion, the will to take

risk

Fix the agreement mistake

risks

show examples

help to

building

Change the verb form

build

show examples

character and

mentailty

Correct your spelling

mentality

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

is essential for

successe

Correct your spelling

success

. I do encourage anyone who

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

goals and dreams, and

want

Correct subject-verb agreement

wants

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

Fix the infinitive

to comes

show examples

comes

Wrong verb form

come

show examples

true to

get

Verb problem

apply

show examples

adapt to

this

essential skill.

Submitted by neamaabdo90 on Fri Mar 22 2024

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coherence cohesion

Work on enhancing your essay's structure by clearly dividing it into paragraphs, each representing a unique idea or point of your argument. This will significantly improve readability and the overall logical flow of your ideas.

coherence cohesion

Be mindful of spelling and grammatical errors; they can distract from your argument's clarity and impact. Examples include 'succese' (success), 'will known' (well known), 'investers' (investors), 'billioner' (billionaire), 'quailty' (quality), 'neccesary' (necessary), 'there' (their), 'mentailty' (mentality). Proofreading more carefully can enhance your essay's professionalism.

task achievement

To improve task achievement, make sure your argument critically evaluates both sides of the argument more deeply. While you do provide examples to support your viewpoint, elaborating further on contrasting viewpoints and then refuting them or explaining why taking risks is superior would offer a more nuanced perspective.

task achievement

Consider including a wider range of vocabulary to articulate your points more effectively. Using varied and precise language can help to express your ideas more clearly and make your essay more engaging for the reader.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
61Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

283 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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The willingness to take risks is the only way one can succeed in life, both personally and professionally. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Today, many people do not know their neighbours in large cities. What problems does this cause? What can be done about this?

school should stop using books for teching children as they find them boring and use films TV and computer instead. to what extent do you agree with this ?

It is often said that we should work to live, not live to work. Discuss both points of view and give your own opinion.

Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+