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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The diagram below shows the floor plan of a public library 20 years ago and how it looks now. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows the floor plan of a public library 20 years ago and how it looks now. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#floor #plan #library #years #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The map describes changes
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 a public library in 20
years
Use synonyms
. It is
noticeanle
Correct your spelling
noticeable
 that more spare space
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 provided nowadays as two tables and multiple chairs are removed currently
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 to 20
years
Use synonyms
 ago. Looking into more details, after entering the entrance, on the right side of the
room
Use synonyms
, the enquiry desk was transformed
in to
Join the words
into
show examples
 a cafe. On the same side,
in
Change the preposition
at
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 the end of the library, a lecture
room
Use synonyms
 took
place
Correct article usage
the place
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 of
children's
Correct article usage
the children's
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 book
section
Use synonyms
. Between
children's
Correct article usage
the children's
show examples
books
Use synonyms
section
Use synonyms
 and the enquiry desk was
area
Add an article
an area
the area
show examples
 for adult fiction
books
Use synonyms
 20
years
Use synonyms
 ago, which now added
information
Correct article usage
an information
show examples
 desk and self-service machines. On the left side of the
room
Use synonyms
, we can tell that the reading
room
Use synonyms
 which contains newspapers and magazines 20
years
Use synonyms
 ago beside the entrance, has now turned
in to
Correct your spelling
into
show examples
 a computer
room
Use synonyms
. Walking along the aisle to the end of the library, we can see an area of children's fiction
books
Use synonyms
, contains a pair of
sofa
Fix the agreement mistake
sofas
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 and some storytelling events, which was a
section
Use synonyms
 of CDs, videos and computer games. Between these two areas, it is now a
section
Use synonyms
contains
Wrong verb form
containing
show examples
 all reference
books
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of adult fiction
books
Use synonyms
 20
years
Use synonyms
 ago.
Submitted by 1434110674 on

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Linking words: Add more linking words.
▼
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words years, room, section, books with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • floor plan
  • public library
  • layout
  • reading area
  • computer station
  • multimedia section
  • children's area
  • reference section
  • study cubicles
  • shelving units
  • digital media
  • technological advancements
  • user behavior
  • accessibility
  • traffic flow
  • modernization
  • community needs
  • conversion
  • allocation
  • removal
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