IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people like to work in teams. Others prefer to work alone. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

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Working in teams is preferred by some
people
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 others like to do their
work
Use synonyms
 individually. Though working in a
group
Use synonyms
 can provide some benefits, it is not as
eficient
Correct your spelling
efficient
 as doing assignments independently. I prefer working individually most of the
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
 rather than working in a
group
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 of colleagues. Completing
work
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 or assignments in a
group
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 can
sometime
Replace the word
sometimes
show examples
 provide benefits for
people
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. It helps when you want to
brainstorming
Change the form of the verb
brainstorm
show examples
 ideas or to discuss an issue. Working with more than one person provides various opportunities to gather excellent ideas and to learn from each other.
For example
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, some university students are assigned to
work
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 in a
group
Use synonyms
 so they can have chances to learn from their peers.
However
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, completing a
work
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 or an assignment in a
group
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 is not always the best way to do the job because it sometimes takes more
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
 and
have
Change the verb form
has
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to
Replace the word
too
show examples
 many distractions.
For example
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, it is not easy to make
people
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focus
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 during the
group
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work
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 or some
people
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 might
doing unneccesary
Verb problem
unnecessarily
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 chat during the
work
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 which might prolong the
work
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.
On the other hand
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, working individually is much more efficient than working in a team because it gives
people
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 the opportunity to become more
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focus
Replace the word
focused
show examples
.
As a result
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,
people
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 can finish their
work
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 faster and better without
Correct your spelling
too
show examples
to
Correct your spelling
too
show examples
Fix the agreement mistake
many
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much
Correct quantifier usage
many
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 distractions.
For example
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, some scientific evidence
show
Change the verb form
shows
show examples
 that working alone
increase
Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
show examples
productivities
Fix the agreement mistake
productivity
show examples
 compared to working in a
group
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.
To conclude
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,
while
Linking Words
 working together in a team can provide some
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
, it
tend
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tends
show examples
 to be less
eficient
Correct your spelling
efficient
 and
wasting
Replace the word
wastes
show examples
 time. In my view, working alone is much better because it gives you space to be more
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focus
Replace the word
focused
show examples
 to complete your tasks. When you have a deep
focus
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in
Change preposition
on
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work
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, it
results
Add the preposition
results in
results from
show examples
 better
work
Use synonyms
 outcomes.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that your argument is well-structured with clear paragraphs - each discussing a separate point. Your paragraphs are well separated, but sometimes, the transition between ideas in paragraphs could be smoother.
Coherence and Cohesion
In your introduction and conclusion, clearly state your preference and summarise your main points. This part is done correctly, enhancing your essay. Maintain this approach in all essays.
Task Response
Back up your opinions with more specific examples. While you have provided general examples, more detailed and personal examples can make your argument stronger.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on varying your sentence structures to enhance readability and engagement. This also helps in making your essay sound more professional and crafted.
Task Response
Review for minor spelling and grammar errors ('to much distractions' should be 'too much distraction'). Though not significantly impacting, they can sometimes detract from the overall quality.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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