IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The graph below shows the average number of UK commuters traveling each day by car, bus or train between 1970 and 2030.

The graph below shows the average number of UK commuters traveling each day by car, bus or train between 1970 and 2030.
#uk #commuters #car #bus #train
The graph illustrates the average number of UK daily
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
 on a basic day by
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
such
 as
car
,
bus
 or
train
Change the verb form
trains
show examples
 over the
period
 of 60
years
.
Overall
,
The
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
commuting by
car
 and
train
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 a tendency
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
growth
Replace the word
grow
show examples
,
while
bus
 usage has
decline
Change the verb form
declined
show examples
over the
last
years
Correct quantifier usage
few years
show examples
.
In addition
,
Car
 usage is a positive line with hitting the highest point during
this
period
 show. As can be seen over the
period
 of 30
years
 first showed the difference
of
Change preposition
between
show examples
 commuting by
bus
 with the rest
transportation
Change preposition
of transportation
show examples
. In that, the number of people
commuted
Change the form of the verb
commuting
show examples
 by
bus
 went down gradually in
this
period
.
However
,
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 wide range of commuters
used
Correct pronoun usage
who used
show examples
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
show examples
 increased relatively in 10
years
first,
after
Correct word choice
and after
show examples
 that, it climbed up rapidly. And
train
 usage has the relative same tendency
with
Change preposition
as
show examples
 people by
car
. Next the
period
 between 2000 to 2023,
this
 can be seen transportation by
car
 and
train
 had the tendency
of remaining
Change preposition
to remain
show examples
 almost stable from 2000 to 2010.
However
, both
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
grow rapidly the great number of people during the
period
 of 20-
years
, especially for
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
show examples
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
 a peak of highest commuters, at around 9
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
.
While
 the
Correct quantifier usage
number of travelers
show examples
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
 by
bus
 declined constantly for the rest of the
period
.
Submitted by okookk123456 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words car, bus, train, period, years with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "rapidly" was used 2 times.
▼

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