You are interested in attending a training course abroad but require financial support to do so. Write a letter to the education department requesting financial assistance.

#course #support #education #department #assistance

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Dear Sir / Madam I am Sarah Anderson web department manager of the

company

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. The reason I am writing is to request financial assistance for a web development training

course

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which is going to be held at McGill University next month. As you are aware of the value of being updated in computer-related departments, taking part in

this

Linking Words

course

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could be beneficial for the future of our

company

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, Since the

company

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has a large number of rivals all over the country which are trying to update their staff's knowledge regularly.

Additionally

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, having different certificates from top-rated universities could bring more reliability for the

company

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and the number of customers will definitely increase in the future. So I am requesting financial aid from the

company

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to register for the so-called

course

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. Please kindly check my request and if possible confirm receiving the funds I need. The

course

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information including the price is attached to the letter, please find it. I will be appreciated if you contribute me to attend to the

course

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. Sincerely yours Sarah Andeson

Submitted by keyhan454 on Mon Mar 25 2024

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Task Achievement

To improve your task achievement, ensure that your letter elaborates more on how the training course directly benefits you and the company. Describe the skills you hope to gain and how these will be applied to your current role or projects.

Coherence and Cohesion

For better coherence and cohesion, consider linking your paragraphs more smoothly. Use transitional phrases to guide the reader through your reasoning and make your argument more persuasive.

Coherence and Cohesion

Work on developing each paragraph with a single, clear idea, supported by specific examples or details. This will make your writing more impactful and easier for the reader to follow.

General Writing Skill

Review and correct minor spelling or grammatical errors such as 'appreciated' to 'appreciate it' and 'Sarah Andeson' to 'Sarah Anderson'. Paying attention to these details can enhance the overall professionalism and clarity of your writing.

2
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

175 words

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You are interested in attending a training course abroad but require financial support to do so. Write a letter to the education department requesting financial assistance.

Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some people think that the best way to improve road safety is to increase the minimum legal age for driving a car or motorbike. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Celebrities are usually famous for glamour and wealth rather than their achievements. Some say taking them as an example can be dangerous for young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion.