Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while other think that are more important factors such as money and apperance. Discuss both view and give your opinion
Many individuals believe that
hard-working
and determination will Correct word choice
hard work
be
Verb problem
help them
succeeded
in their Wrong verb form
succeed
life
. Fix the agreement mistake
lives
While others
think that money and appearance are important factors Correct word choice
Others
to make
their Change preposition
in making
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
success
. Replace the word
successful
This
essay argues that success
in life
demand
Correct subject-verb agreement
demands
on
hard work and determination, and will explain why I choose it.
On the one hand, Change preposition
apply
life
will be succeeded bases
on trying to do Wrong verb form
based
somethings
and having Fix the agreement mistake
something
the
determination. Actually, it can be true because the appearance of Correct article usage
apply
success
in life
belong
to Change the verb form
belongs
hard-working
. It means they have patience and Replace the word
hard work
clearly
Change the word
clear
decision
, the Fix the agreement mistake
decisions
success
will acquire
more quickly. Wrong verb form
be acquired
For example
, most of
students Change preposition
apply
in
Change preposition
apply
a
Correct article usage
apply
global
have Change the word
globally
a
good Correct article usage
apply
quality
Fix the agreement mistake
qualities
base
on Replace the word
based
power
and knowledge they have. Correct article usage
the power
Thus
, the result they achieved will become.
On the other hand
, public
thinks finance and appearance are an important factor Add an article
the public
to make
their Change preposition
in making
life become
better. Wrong verb form
lives
This
means that person
will Correct article usage
a person
happiness
and Replace the word
be happy
having
enough Wrong verb form
have
all
things when they have two factors. Of Correct determiner usage
apply
course
it may be true, but the Add a comma
course,
major
of it Correct your spelling
majority
bases
on fortune, it can solve certainly. If you want to have Wrong verb form
is based
success
for a long time, it will be bad
Correct article usage
a bad
ideas
and Fix the agreement mistake
idea
also
make your life
more difficult.
In conclusion, success
always surround
everyone, but you should have chosen each of Change the verb form
surrounds
Correct article usage
the factor
factor
and Fix the agreement mistake
factors
effort
of time that make your Fix the agreement mistake
efforts
life
better.Submitted by [email protected] on
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Introduction and Conclusion
Ensure that your introduction clearly presents the topic and your opinion. Your introduction should give a brief overview of the points that you will discuss in the essay.
Supported Main Points
Develop your main points with specific examples and explanations. Try to include personal, historical, or hypothetical examples to support your arguments.
Complete Response
Make sure your essay directly addresses all parts of the task. Your opinion should be clear throughout the essay, and the conclusion should summarise your views effectively.
Logical Structure
Improve the logical flow of your ideas by using linking words and phrases more effectively. This enhances the coherence of the essay and makes it easier to follow.
Clear Comprehensive Ideas
Work on the clarity of your ideas by articulating them more precisely. Avoid overly complex or unclear sentences that might confuse the reader.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
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