aN INCREASING NUMBER OF PEOPLE WANT TO BUY CLOTHES, SHOES, AND OTHER ITEMS PRODUCED BU FAMOUS INTERNATIONAL BRANDS. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

#people #clothes #shoes #items #bu #brands #development

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Nowadays the majority of

people

Use synonyms

are rising to purchase branded products like a famous international brand. Because they are living competitive

society

Use synonyms

. it has both pros and cons effect. in

this

Linking Words

essay, I will discuss about it.

Firstly

Linking Words

, these days

people

Use synonyms

are living competitive

society

Use synonyms

. they are trying to live always high reach level for each other. They do not think about their financial side. What did others want to do

Change the punctuation

show examples

For example

Linking Words

, a branded company like Nike, and Adidas company very famous these days with the young

generation

Use synonyms

Moreover

Linking Words

secondly

Linking Words

society

Use synonyms

's young

generation

Use synonyms

depends

with

Change preposition

show examples

perance

Correct your spelling

prance

they do not think about how to manage the financial side. They

perches

Change the verb form

perch

show examples

like a cap, choose and T-shirt branded company.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, it is the same way that the young

generation

Use synonyms

some of them have financial issues. Because international branded is very expensive. young

generation

Use synonyms

does not have to spend much more money because they depend on their parents.

As a result

Linking Words

, younger

people

Use synonyms

trying to stop education and they are finding occupations. Because they wanted to do fashion like others.

Therefore

Linking Words

, more and more young

people

Use synonyms

are who do not take higher education.they do fashion and earn money. In conclusion, an international branded name is very popular nowadays

society

Use synonyms

therefore

Linking Words

, pros and cons. Some of them

wearing

Wrong verb form

wear

show examples

it for faction and others one is going to find occupation living

society

Use synonyms

reach and do fashion.

Submitted by ma.ushamanu1024 on Tue Mar 26 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Clarify your introduction by presenting a thesis statement that directly addresses the essay question. Make sure your introduction sets up a clear roadmap for your essay.

task achievement

Develop your main points with more detailed explanations and more specific examples. This will make your arguments stronger and more persuasive.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within each paragraph are related to this main idea. Use transition words to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

Revise your conclusion to more effectively summarize your main points and clearly state your opinion on the topic. This helps reinforce your argument and gives the essay a strong ending.

general

Pay attention to spelling, grammar, and punctuation. Errors in these areas can distract from your message and make your essay harder to understand. Consider using tools or seeking feedback to help improve these areas.

general

Try to maintain a formal tone throughout your essay. Avoid contractions (e.g., replace 'do not' with 'do not') and informal language. This will make your essay sound more professional.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

235 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
News editors decide what to broadcast on television and what to print in newspapers. What factors do you think influence these decisions? Do we become used to bad news? Would it be better if more good news was reported?
One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is what to broadcast on television and what to print in newspapers. Now people are beginning to realize that everyday news has become an essential part of our lives. Personally, I tend to think that showing both sides of the news is essential.
4.5
band
You are visiting another town next week for a short break. Write a letter to the tourist information centre. • tell them how long you are staying • ask for some suggestions for what to do • find out if there are any local events happening at the time
I am writing to request information about accommodation to stay next following month. Moreover, I would be grateful, if you could inform me about the events which organising next month.
4
band
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development
At present time ,some companies advertise their new products to showcase the function of products to attract customers.In this essay, I will explain both sides of perspectives and overall my opinion .
4.5
band
Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us t buy things. othere people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
It goes without saying that people are using mobiles phones to pay the bill. An argument has bees put forward that different countries paying bill increasing using there own mobile app to pay amount. In my opinion, this statement hold a valid ground.
6
band
Human activity has had a negative impact on plants and animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be changed, while others think that actions can be taken to bring the change. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Moral activities have been bad impact on environments and organisms around the globe. Many people think that it's not possible in the opposite direction, although others remain that operation can be taken to change. This essay agrees with the latter point and will show that the authority must implement decisions to massive degradation, as the potential change in human behaviour could significantly improve the situation by greater mentality.

aN INCREASING NUMBER OF PEOPLE WANT TO BUY CLOTHES, SHOES, AND OTHER ITEMS PRODUCED BU FAMOUS INTERNATIONAL BRANDS. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

News editors decide what to broadcast on television and what to print in newspapers. What factors do you think influence these decisions? Do we become used to bad news? Would it be better if more good news was reported?

You are visiting another town next week for a short break. Write a letter to the tourist information centre. • tell them how long you are staying • ask for some suggestions for what to do • find out if there are any local events happening at the time

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasize that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us t buy things. othere people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Human activity has had a negative impact on plants and animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be changed, while others think that actions can be taken to bring the change. Discuss both views and give your opinion.