some people think that success in life comes form hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #success #life #form #work #determination #factors #money #appearance

In order to achieve

success

, there are a plethora of ways to do so.

While

some people believe that

success

comes from looks and money, others think that working hard and having determination are the two most essential elements.

This

writing states that the only way to reach triumph in life is to be diligent and dedicated. On the

one

hand , being attractive and financially advanced

play

Fix the agreement mistake

plays

show examples

a vital role in

one

's achievements. The first reason is that it helps people to attain fame and power. Taking the example of the character Batman in DC Comics, with the fortune his parents left him, it is not hard for him to continue the family business

as well as

spend on gear.

Furthermore

, personal appearance is

one

of the crucial factors impacting achievement.

For instance

candidates have a better chance of securing a job if they display confident body posture or wear appropriate clothing,

in addition

to possessing great skills and experience.

However

, these are just minor contributors to

success

in life.

Firstly

, without an assiduous attitude, no

one

can gain

experiences

Fix the agreement mistake

experience

show examples

in many aspects of life.

Secondly

, a strong-willed mindset

also

creates motivation to set goals and serves as the foundation of

success

As a result

, it allows people to overcome complex problems in all situations and always keep moving forward to reach long-term goals. In conclusion,

although

money and personal appearance have an influence on achievement, it seems to me that hard work and determination are the dominant factors in achieving the highest level of

success

Tue Mar 26 2024

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task achievement

To improve your score, ensure each paragraph has a clear and distinct main idea, supported by specific examples. Try using more real-world examples to illustrate your points, rather than fictional characters like Batman.

coherence cohesion

Your essay demonstrates a logical structure, but consider making the connection between paragraphs smoother. Use transition words or phrases to guide the reader through your argument more fluidly.

task achievement

For a higher score, aim to develop your main points further with more detailed examples and analysis. This will make your argument more persuasive and your essay more engaging.

coherence cohesion

Ensure your introduction and conclusion are clearly marked and effectively sum up your essay's main points. Adding a summary sentence at the end of body paragraphs can also enhance clarity and cohesion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

260 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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some people think that success in life comes form hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many people argue that free public transportation should be available in most major cities. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this idea?

Communication through text messaging and other instant forms of online communication are short and basic. Some people think this will be death of grammar and spelling. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that the range of technology currently available is increasing the gap between rich people and poor people. Others think that it is causing the opposite effect. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that it is better to have the same job throughout their life, while others think that people should change their job after some period of time. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

Despite better access to education, many adults today still cannot read or write. In what ways are they disadvantaged? What can governments do to help them ?