IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The line graph and table show the average monthly temperatures and annual hours of sunshine in three major cities.

The line graph and table show the average monthly temperatures and annual hours of sunshine in three major cities.
#line #show #temperatures #hours #sunshine #three #cities
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The line graph and the table
gives
Change the verb form
give
show examples
 data on average
temperatures
Use synonyms
 and yearly
hours
Use synonyms
 of
sunshine
Use synonyms
 in
London
Use synonyms
, New
York
Use synonyms
 and
Sydney
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, the temperature patterns for
London
Use synonyms
 and New
York
Use synonyms
 are similar with the hottest weather being in July
while
Linking Words
 the highest average temperature in
Sydney
Use synonyms
 is in January. The
sunshine
Use synonyms
hours
Use synonyms
 in New
York
Use synonyms
 and
Sydney
Use synonyms
 are nearly the same and much higher than the figure for
London
Use synonyms
. Looking at the monthly average
temperatures
Use synonyms
 in more detail, the changes in
temperatures
Use synonyms
 in
London
Use synonyms
 and New
York
Use synonyms
 show a similarity
although
Linking Words
 the city in North America has warmer summers and colder winters. The average
temperatures
Use synonyms
 in both
London
Use synonyms
 and New
York
Use synonyms
 respectively peak at 23
degrees
Use synonyms
 and 29
degrees
Use synonyms
 in July,
whereas
Linking Words
 January is the month when
Sydney
Use synonyms
 experiences the warmest weather with 25
degrees
Use synonyms
. New
York
Use synonyms
’s
temperatures
Use synonyms
 decrease to an average of around 5
degrees
Use synonyms
 in December/January, 3
degrees
Use synonyms
 lower than the figure for
London
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
Sydney
Use synonyms
 shows the lowest average
temperatures
Use synonyms
 in July, reaching just over 15
degrees
Use synonyms
. As far as
sunshine
Use synonyms
 duration is concerned, New
York
Use synonyms
 and
Sydney
Use synonyms
 have relatively similar averages of 2,535 and 2,473
hours
Use synonyms
 respectively.
However
Linking Words
, the
annualy
Correct your spelling
annual
 average number of
sunshine
Use synonyms
hours
Use synonyms
 across
London
Use synonyms
 stands at a much lower rate with 1,180
hours
Use synonyms
 per year.
Submitted by rooz.un1300 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words temperatures, hours, sunshine, london, york, sydney, degrees with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: