Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest time of most people lives. Other think that adults life brings more happiest, in spite of great responsibility. Discuss both these views and give your opinionp

there is no denying the fact that the teenage
years
are the happiest
time
of most people's lives.
While
it is a commonly held belief that adult life brings more happiness, in spite of great responsibility, there is
also
an argument that opposes it. in my opinion, I consider that almost all teenagers are happiest most of the
time
.
to begin
with, some people think that the teenage
years
are the happiest
time
because the teenage
years
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
still young, and they must have a great
time
in addition
feeling
Change preposition
to feeling
show examples
happy.
In other words
, if the teenage
years
didn'
t
felling
Correct your spelling
feeling
show examples
happy maybe they have bad
felling
Correct your spelling
feelings
show examples
in the life.
for example
, when I was a child I didn'
t
feel good because I didn'
t
have fun. Another point to consider, others think that adult life brings more happiness. It is
also
possible to say that maybe some teenage
years
didn'
Verb problem
weren't
show examples
t
the happiest
time
because
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
matters around their parents they didn'
t
get
them
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
children some free
time
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
have fun.
Moreover
, the teenage
years
are feeling very bad.
For instance
, my friend is so bad
cuase
Correct your spelling
cause
because
his parents make him very strange. In conclusion, despite people having different views, I believe that of the discussion both
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
right
Submitted by ahmed.amoudi00 on

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Task Achievement
Your essay attempts to address the topic, but the clarity and development of ideas are weak. Focus on clearly outlining your main points in the introduction and ensuring each body paragraph discusses a single main idea with supporting examples or explanations.
Task Achievement
Your essay would benefit from a clear thesis statement that directly addresses the question. Each paragraph should have a clear topic sentence, and ideas should be expanded upon with specific examples or explanations.
Coherence & Cohesion
The coherence of your essay is affected by a lack of clear logical structure and transitions between ideas. Try to use connecting words to show relationships between ideas and paragraphs, so the reader can easily follow your argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
Proofread your essay for grammatical and spelling errors, which can detract from your argument's clarity and professionalism. Consider practicing sentence variety and complex structures to improve your writing style.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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