Some cities have vehicle-free days when private cars, trucks and motorcycles are banned from the city centre. People are encouraged to use public transportation such as buses, taxis and metro on vehicle-free days. To what extent do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Due to
the massive
use
of automobiles in modern society, some cities established car-free
days
to persuade the masses to
use
public
transportations
Fix the agreement mistake
transportation
show examples
.
This
essay will demonstrate that the merits are massive. Undoubtedly, there are several causes of why car-free
days
have a demerit.
By using
Change preposition
Using
show examples
transportation
instead
of private
cars
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will give up some freedom and flexibility.
In particular
, modern people will lose the option of hopping in the car and driving wherever they want at a moment's notice.
Also
, in an emergency case, people need to
use
their private
cars
to travel in the middle of the night or long
distance
Fix the agreement mistake
distances
show examples
. In spite of the above opinions, I contend that there are compelling reasons why vehicle-free
days
have more merits.
To begin
with, by not using our own
cars
it will help to alleviate the pollution. Specifically, the
use
of public transport
instead
of private vehicles causes less pollution since it produces less car fumes.
Secondly
, car-free
days
lead to
reducing
Wrong verb form
reduced
show examples
traffic jams. Since most individuals tend to
use
their own private
cars
in their daily lives it will create traffic jams and road packs.
Thus
, it is good to
use
public transport so that everyone can not face the problem of roads blocked by traffic.
Furthermore
, it will save us money. In general, using a car requires lots of expenses for fuel,
repairing
Replace the word
repair
show examples
, maintenance costs, etc. In a nutshell, even though there are disadvantages of vehicle-free policies since
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
limits
Correct subject-verb agreement
limit
show examples
the convenience for individuals, I think there are countless advantages since it is not only eco-friendly but
also
connects
Correct subject-verb agreement
connect
show examples
to saving money.
Submitted by chlflsk4112 on

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Task Achievement
Ensure that your essay directly addresses the prompt in a comprehensive manner. While you've presented a balanced view, make sure every paragraph directly links back to how the advantages outweigh the disadvantages as per the essay question.
Task Achievement
Use more diverse and specific examples to support your points more effectively. This will help strengthen your argument and provide a clearer understanding of your stance on the issue.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on transitioning smoothly between paragraphs and within paragraphs to enhance the flow of your essay. This can be done through the use of linking phrases and clearer thematic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph.
Coherence and Cohesion
While your introduction and conclusion are clear, ensure they are fully developed. Consider stating your main argument more clearly in your introduction and summarizing your key points more succinctly in your conclusion.
Coherence and Cohesion
To further improve coherence, try to integrate your examples more seamlessly into your argument. This includes explaining how each example directly supports your stance in relation to the essay question.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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