Globalization has both advantages and disadvantages. Discuss both and give youe opinion ?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In the globalization era,
technology
Use synonyms
has been rapidly growth because some academists develop
technology
Use synonyms
based on
science
Use synonyms
. Personally, I believe that
science
Use synonyms
can support to enhance
people
Use synonyms
's activities. So, I totally agree with
this
Linking Words
statement. First and foremost,
science
Use synonyms
can create an abundance of technologies for working and
transportation
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, some
people
Use synonyms
believe that some assignments can faster using
technology
Use synonyms
like a laptop or smartphone than using basic
science
Use synonyms
like calculating big data using paper which is
wasting
Replace the word
waste
show examples
time
Change preposition
of time
show examples
to write in paper.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, some technologies use modern
science
Use synonyms
or machine learning because it is more quickly.
For instance
Linking Words
, some students at universities who using cloud computing to process big data more effectively and more efficiently to calculate or break down a lot of data. On the other reason, some
people
Use synonyms
use
science
Use synonyms
for developing
transportation
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
as bridges, railways, and other infrastructures to support
people
Use synonyms
's lives.
Moreover
Linking Words
, scientists still enhance public
transportation
Use synonyms
qualities which are highway designs and real-time updates using a geospatial approach. I believe that scientists can tackle some obstacles using
science
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, academists still developing new algorithms to enhance accuracy of the global positioning
such
Linking Words
as traffic jams and estimation .
As a result
Linking Words
, all communities can monitor conditions in some places using a geospatial approach.
To conclude
Linking Words
,
science
Use synonyms
has an abundance
benefits
Change preposition
of benefits
show examples
for supporting daily activities
such
Linking Words
as working and studying. I believe that
science
Use synonyms
can enhance our quality which using
technology
Use synonyms
or
transportation
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure the essay directly addresses the task by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of globalization, as well as clearly stating your opinion. This response seems to focus more on the benefits of science and technology, which is slightly off-topic.
coherence and cohesion
Organize your ideas more effectively by using clear paragraph structures, with topic sentences, support sentences, and examples. This helps improve the logical flow and cohesion of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Provide a clearer introduction and conclusion. The introduction should outline what the essay will discuss, and the conclusion should summarize the key points made and restate the opinion, linking back to the question.
task response
Example sentences should be directly relevant to the question prompt. Include examples that illustrate both the positive and negative impacts of globalization to balance your essay.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: