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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

In some cities, there is less control over the design and construction of new homes and office buildings. People can build in whatever style they like. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#cities #control #design #construction #homes #office #buildings #people #style
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Recently, the loose regulation of design and
construction
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 of
buildings
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 has become the focus of society. Some countries are implementing schemes which are the
construction
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 of new
estates
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 are loosen regulated. As far as I am concerned, potential benefits overshadow its perceived drawbacks. First of all, the irregular
construction
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 determined by the house owner might threaten the safety of living. Building structure is related to the strength of
construction
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, which is the guarantee of the quality of
construction
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.
For instance
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, some dwellers design their
estates
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 not fit with the requirement of structure.
This
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 reckless practice may be detrimental to the strength of
construction
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.
Therefore
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, loosening regulations on the decoration of
buildings
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 is unwise. Apart from the structure, the unqualified products of interior decoration
also
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 harm citizens’ health. Take oil paint as an example, producers of oil paints tend to use expired materials to cut down their budgets. If the authority lacks the management of the origins of the constructive materials, people are more likely to be exposed to substandard products. Their health may face serious consequences because of the poisonous chemicals produced. There is no doubt that dwellers have the right to make their own decisions for their houses.
However
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, it is not reasonable that their unlimited rights may violate the rights of others.
For example
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, some structures may randomly interfere with the lighting of surrounding
buildings
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due to
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 the height of some owners'
estates
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.
Therefore
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, the
buildings
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 should be regulated to ensure most dwellers’ rights.
To conclude
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, despite the benefits, having fewer regulations over the design and building of new
estates
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 may result in several disadvantages.
Submitted by vancy0119 on

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task achievement
Remember to directly address the question in your introduction, stating whether you believe the advantages or disadvantages are more significant. This gives your essay a clear stance from the beginning.
task achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure to provide more explicit, varied examples that directly support your points. While you've given examples, diversifying them can strengthen your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure, but you can enhance coherence by using a wider range of linking phrases and transition words. This will make the progression of ideas smoother.
coherence and cohesion
To clarify your essay's stance, it's beneficial to have a summary sentence at the end of the introduction that encapsulates the main argument or viewpoint.
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