IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

People in your area are having problems with their internet connection. Write a letter to the company which provides the connection. In your letter: - describe the problems - explain how they are affecting people - say what the company should do to help

#people #area #internet #connection #company
Dear Sir Or Madam, I am writing
this
 letter to bring to your attention the problem of poor internet connection we are facing. The speed of
coonection
Correct your spelling
connection
 is too slow and often it gets disconnected too. Downloading of files is not
completing
Wrong verb form
completed
show examples
. people face lots of
issue
Change to a plural noun
issues
show examples
 as elders are not able to complete office
work
 and children are not able to complete their homework on time. people have to use cyber cafes and
co -office
Correct your spelling
co-office
show examples
 spaces to complete
work
 dependent on
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
show examples
. Internet speed has become
talk
Add an article
the talk
show examples
 of town and
majority
Add an article
the majority
a majority
show examples
 of people are finding
difficult
Correct pronoun usage
it difficult
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 to
compete
Correct your spelling
complete
show examples
work
 on time.
Therefore
, I request you to please look into
this
 matter and depute skilled engineers to resolve the problem immediately. Kindly draft an
eloborate
Correct your spelling
elaborate
 plan to
work
 on the problem and share
with
Correct pronoun usage
it with
show examples
 citizens . please make it
priority
Add an article
a priority
show examples
 and try to fix
this
 on
urgent
Correct article usage
an urgent
show examples
 basis. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Yours faithfully, John
michael
Change the capitalization
Michael
show examples
Submitted by yash334 on

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Coherence & Cohesion
To enhance coherence, consider employing a wider range of linking devices to connect ideas more smoothly.
Task Achievement
When describing problems, provide specific examples to make your arguments more compelling.
Greeting & Closing
Your letter opens and concludes with appropriate formal greetings and closings.
Logical Structure
You structured the letter logically, grouping related ideas into paragraphs.
Completion of Task
You clearly described how the internet issues are affecting different groups within the community.
Writing Tone
The tone of your letter is suitably formal and polite, fitting the letter's context.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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