It is better to go out for a live performance (a show or concert) than stay at home watching TV or using the computer. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#live #performance #show #concert #home #tv #computer

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Nowadays, people can enjoy movies and music through personal devices

such

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as laptops or even smartphones

due to

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information technology developments.

However

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, there are some people who would put effort into watching an art show's direct shows

such

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as opera or live music events. In my opinion, I would prefer to attend the on-site performance despite looking at it on the screen for several reasons. Live-action theatricals or music concerts give exceptional experiences for some reason. We can enjoy the actors or singers presenting their artwork directly. There is no edited scene or tuned vocals

while

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they performed it in real-time shows so we would see their talent.

Then

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, watching the artist's performance on-site could be a good appreciation for their works because people usually pay more and put more effort into seeing their actions directly through live shows. Enjoying the shows with other fans with similar enthusiasm

also

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gives another impression rather than watching it at home. Watching an event through an entertainment platform could be more efficient since we can access it whenever we like.

Nevertheless

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, it has a drawback

such

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as the movies or songs might be adjusted to eliminate certain mistakes that could occur during the production, so the viewers were not able to judge their actions. In conclusion, I agree that attending live action would give a better experience rather than watching it through your personal devices, even though there will be additional effort to enjoy it.

In addition

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, we could assess an artist's talent through their live performance objectively and accurately as a fan.

Submitted by cracko.eko on Fri Mar 29 2024

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examples

Ensure to provide more specific examples to support your arguments. While your essay touches on the advantages of live performances, adding concrete examples or personal experiences can enhance the persuasiveness of your argument.

structure

You have successfully introduced and concluded your essay, clearly stating your opinion. This strong structure guides the reader through your argument effectively.

counterargument

Consider developing your counterargument further. You've mentioned the efficiency of watching through personal devices but exploring this contrast in greater detail can add depth to your essay.

argument clarity

Your essay clearly communicates your preference for live performances, making a compelling case for the unique experiences they offer.

structure

The logical structure of your essay, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, makes your argument easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

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It is better to go out for a live performance (a show or concert) than stay at home watching TV or using the computer. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that individuals are born to be leaders, others believe leadership can be learnt. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. Why do many working people not get enough excercise? What can be done about this problem?

Many people try to create a balance between their professional life and their personal life. However, very few are able to achieve such a balance. What problems stop people from achieving a work-life balance? How can these problems be overcome?