Nowadays, children watch a lot of TV and play video games. However, some think that these activities are not beneficial for a child’s mental health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In today's digital age,
children
are exposed to a significant amount of screen time
, spending hours watching TV
and playing video
games. Some people say that it has harmful psychological impacts on young minds. This
essay agrees with the notion that these activities can be detrimental to a child's mental well-being.
One of the major concerns associated with excessive TV
watching and video
game playing is the sedentary lifestyle it promotes. Children
who spend prolonged periods sitting in front of screens are at risk of developing psychological problems as a result
. A sedentary and indoor lifestyle increases the risk of mental health disorders such
as depression and anxiety. For example
, a study conducted by the World Health Organization found a correlation between excessive screen time
and an increased prevalence of depression and anxiety.
Another significant drawback of excessive TV
watching and video
game playing is the potential for social isolation and impaired social skills
. Children
who spend excessive time
engaged in these activities may miss out on real-world interactions and face difficulties developing meaningful relationships. Face-to-face communication and social engagement are vital for a juvenile's social and emotional development. Without these experiences, children
may struggle to develop essential social skills
, such
as empathy, communication, and conflict resolution. For instance
, research conducted by the American Academy of Pediatrics suggests that excessive screen time
during early childhood can lead to delayed social skills
and difficulties in forming interpersonal relationships.
In conclusion, excessive TV
watching and video
game playing can have negative effects on a youth's mental health. The sedentary nature of these activities hampers a juvenile's emotional development and hinders their social skills
while
also
increasing their mental problems.Submitted by 11E4 Community on
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coherence cohesion
Try to incorporate a wider range of linking words and phrases to enhance the flow between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
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task achievement
Consider including more in-depth analysis and evaluation of the examples you present. This could make your argument stronger and more compelling.
task achievement
You made a clear statement of your opinion in the introduction and restated it in the conclusion, which is good for task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear logical structure, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the topic.
task achievement
You effectively used relevant specific examples to support your main points.
Your opinion
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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
