IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Old Towns and Cities The world has many towns and cities constructed in previous centuries that were more suitable and livable for people in those times than they are now. What problems will this cause? What can be done to solve these problems?

There now exist numerous
towns
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 and
cities
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 that were constructed centuries ago.
While
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 these places were once considered livable, they often face
challenges
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 in meeting the needs and expectations of contemporary society that can only realistically be resolved by local authorities. One of the primary
challenges
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 associated with old
towns
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 and
cities
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 is outdated
infrastructure
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 and limited accessibility. Many of these places were designed before the advent of private vehicles and modern transportation
systems
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.
Consequently
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, narrow streets, lack of parking facilities, and insufficient public transportation options pose significant
challenges
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 for mobility and convenience.
Similarly
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, outdated sewage and waste management
systems
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 may not be equipped to handle the needs of a larger population, leading to environmental and health hazards. One well-known example of
this
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 would be in developing
cities
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such
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 as Ho Chi Minh City in Vietnam where older buildings that collapse are common and there are geographical
challenges
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 that limit the development of other areas. Since local authorities have few options,
this
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 means many less privileged residents must live in conditions that are not ideal. To overcome these
challenges
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, a comprehensive revitalization plan is crucial. Local governments should invest in
infrastructure
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 upgrades,
such
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 as widening roads, improving public transportation networks, and implementing smart traffic management
systems
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.
Additionally
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, the integration of sustainable solutions, including renewable energy sources and eco-friendly waste management
systems
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, can contribute to the long-term livability of these areas. By prioritizing
infrastructure
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 development and accessibility enhancements, old
towns
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 and
cities
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 can adapt to modern demands without compromising their historical integrity. Local governments can
also
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, in collaboration with residents and stakeholders, organize cultural events, festivals, and initiatives to celebrate the heritage of these areas.
This
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 holistic support will prolong and support revitalization efforts long-term. In conclusion, by adopting a balanced approach to preservation, investing in
infrastructure
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 and accessibility, and fostering local engagement, older
cities
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 can overcome inherent
challenges
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 and regain their livability. Only through
such
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 concerted efforts can old
towns
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 and
cities
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 be restored and cherished for generations to come.

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Introduction and Conclusion
Maintain the clarity and conciseness in your introduction and conclusion. These sections provide a solid framework for your argument, setting the stage and wrapping up effectively.
Use of Examples
Continue using specific examples to support your points. They enrich your essay and make your arguments more tangible and convincing.
Topic Understanding
Keep a good balance between preservation and modern demands as it shows a sophisticated understanding of the topic.
Depth of Analysis
Consider exploring a wider range of solutions and their implications to provide a more in-depth analysis.
Logical Structure
Your essay demonstrates a coherent organization of ideas, effectively using paragraphs to separate distinct points.
Use of Relevant Examples
You successfully integrated a relevant example, enhancing the argument's credibility and relatability.
Balanced Argument
The essay effectively balances the argument between the need for modernization and the importance of preserving historical integrity.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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