Some people think that government should ban dangerous sports while others think people should ha e freedom to do anysports or activity. Discuss both views and give your opinion

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, the participation of individuals in dangerous actions has increased dramatically.
Although
Linking Words
some people correctly argue that these types of sports can lead to incremental violence, others believe that doing so will result in softening stress. In my idea, governments should not be allowed to engage in individual personal entertainment. As a matter of fact, the first group of the community who supports the idea of forbidding the public from dangerous sports, believe that frequently being involved in
such
Linking Words
exercises, in the long run, may result in
disappearing
Verb problem
apply
show examples
the scare of hazardous movement and result in unpleasant effects on the young generation.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are some logical reasoning support the idea of offering flexibility to do anything. These groups of society claim that taking part in
such
Linking Words
exciting exercises reduces stress and tension. In their mind, attending these sports puts up the level of x hormone which plays an important vital in balancing an individual's stress. As a matter of fact, the feeling of having the right to do everything that a person can do is more important than doing it . So, it is not reasonable, in my belief, to compel society to abandon a group of actions.
Overall
Linking Words
, considering the fact that giving freedom to people to be involved in dangerous hobbies or banning them by various strategies is
such
Linking Words
a controversial issue, it will be helpful to find what the total advantages of each decision are. From my point of view, freedom feeling can not be replaced with any feeling.
Submitted by zari.shamsa40 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Details & Examples
Provide more concrete examples to strengthen your arguments. This will make your essay more persuasive and grounded.
Opinion & Conclusion
While your essay introduces and concludes the topic, a clearer stance in the conclusion would strengthen your position. Clearly state your opinion in the conclusion for a more compelling argument.
Sentence Variety & Linking
Work on varying sentence structures and linking words to enhance the flow and cohesion of your essay. Effective use of these elements can make your argument more compelling.
Grammar & Accuracy
Check and revise for minor grammatical errors to enhance clarity and professionalism of your writing.
Structure
Successfully introduced and provided a conclusion to your essay, presenting a clear structure.
Content Coverage
Good job in discussing both views, which addresses the essay prompt appropriately.
Personal Opinion
Your personal opinion is clear and maintains a consistent presence throughout the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • ban
  • dangerous sports
  • freedom of choice
  • public health concerns
  • social and economic costs
  • personal freedom
  • responsibility
  • regulations
  • safety measures
  • effective governance
  • assessing risks
  • guidelines
  • personal freedom
  • educate
  • informed decision-making
  • middle ground
  • public safety
  • strict regulations
  • alternatives
What to do next:
Look at other essays: