Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can know when they leave prison. Do you agree or disagree?
Many
criminal
have a low stage of Change to a plural noun
criminals
education
which is showed
by a study. Some Wrong verb form
shown
people
believe that education
is the only way to decreases
Wrong verb form
decrease
the
Correct article usage
apply
crime
and educate the prisoners
so that they know about it. This
essay completely agree
with Change the verb form
agrees
this
statement because by gain
knowledge Replace the word
gaining
people
can able to make comparison
between bad and good Fix the agreement mistake
comparisons
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
besides
, prisoner knows about the
Correct article usage
apply
punishment
and how a criminal treated
by society .
In the beginning, if Add a missing verb
are treated
people
gain enough knowledge about ehitics
and social criteria they will Correct your spelling
ethics
thought
Change the verb form
think
second
time before occur a Correct article usage
a second
crime
. It is only the power of education
by which one can understand the difference between moral and immoral works. People
able
to compare between what is essential for them and what Add a missing verb
are able
not
. It is often said that Add a missing verb
is not
education
shows the ehitical
path and it makes Correct your spelling
ethical
individual
more powerful. Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
For example
, an educated man knows about the laws and regulations of his country's
so he never Change noun form
country
break
Change the verb form
breaks
it
consciously.
Correct pronoun usage
them
Furthermore
, if the prisoners
get educated during their punishment
time they able
to Add a missing verb
are able
know
about the rules ,the laws and the appropriate Verb problem
learn
punishment
which
they get after Correct pronoun usage
apply
occured
Correct your spelling
committing
a crimes
. Correct the article-noun agreement
crimes
a crime
It's
advantage is that they never again join any bad things after Correct your spelling
Its
free
from jail. Add a missing verb
being free
For example
, many country
provides Change to a plural noun
countries
the
common Correct article usage
apply
education
and ethical lesson
for Fix the agreement mistake
lessons
the
Correct article usage
apply
prisoners
who needs
it and Correct subject-verb agreement
need
a
research recently Correct article usage
apply
conduct
by Wrong verb form
conducted
the
UNESCO Correct article usage
apply
in
Change preposition
apply
which they
found Correct pronoun usage
apply
this
process is become
beneficial for Verb problem
apply
prisoners
and the
Correct article usage
apply
crime
decreases about
20% after a criminal knows about the Change preposition
by about
punishment
.
In conclusion, it is strongly agree
that Change the verb form
is strongly agreed
education
is the effective purpose to rise down
the Change preposition
apply
crime
levels and when a prisoner get
educated he does not dare to Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
do
Verb problem
commit
crime
again.Add an article
the crime
Submitted by tanakchakma55 on
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Grammar and Spelling
Try to avoid spelling errors and focus on accurate grammar usage to make your essay more professional. For instance, 'Many criminal have a low stage of education which is showed by a study.' could be corrected to 'Many criminals have a low level of education, as shown by studies.'
Sentence Structure and Vocabulary
Enhance your essay by using a variety of sentence structures and enriching your vocabulary. This not only makes your writing more engaging but also demonstrates your language competence. For example, instead of repeating 'educate' and 'knowledge,' consider synonyms like 'instruct,' 'teach,' 'awareness,' and 'understanding.'
Supporting Examples
When providing examples, ensure they are detailed and directly support your main points. For example, mentioning specific prison education programs and their outcomes can strengthen your argument.
Position Clarity
You presented a clear stance throughout the essay, maintaining consistency in your agreement with the statement.
Essay Structure
Good job on structuring your essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This organization helps in presenting your ideas logically.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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