Space exploration is much too expensive and the money should be spent on more important things. Q: What is your opinion?
I believe that it is a valid statement.
However
, some people may believe that investing in space
exploration
is also
an important field which we should dive into. Let's further
discuss on
what makes Change preposition
apply
space
exploration
important and what other pursuits that
might be as crucial or might even be more needed.
By researching the Correct pronoun usage
apply
space
beyond our world
, we know what dangers and opportunities it might hold. For instance
, we need to have a contigency
plan for unexpected Correct your spelling
contingency
things
, such
as asteroids falling down to earth
or a sudden heatwave caused by the sun. Capitalize word
Earth
Furthermore
, it is entirely possible that the Earth might someday run out of its resources. Therefore
, human
might need another habitable place. Right now, we somewhat have enough knowledge to deduce that Mars might be the second habitable planet in the Milky Way. These Fix the agreement mistake
humans
things
could otherwise
be unforeseeable if we had never explored what's outside of our world
. However
, Space
exploration
does not come cheap. Budgets used for the materials, technologies, and other resources that are required for its research can be quite hefty and can be used for other major causes.
We are experiencing numerous kinds of crisis
, Fix the agreement mistake
crises
such
as global warming, pollution, world
hunger, diseases, and much
more unfortunate Correct quantifier usage
many
things
. All living beings, be it
humans, animals, Correct pronoun usage
they
plants
are Correct word choice
or plants
all
currently experiencing Correct determiner usage
apply
crisis
and it endangers their very Correct article usage
a crisis
lifes
. These problems are Correct your spelling
lives
alot
more instant and dire as opposed to the Correct your spelling
a lot
things
outside our world
. Instead
of investing in something that we aim to mitigate for another 30 or more years into the future, we can use this
significant amount of money to use it to help and
tackle the issues we are currently facing.
In conclusion, Correct word choice
apply
while
there is obviously merit in investing in space
exploration
, there are a lot more critical situations we are facing right now. As a society, we need to make a wise and thought-out decision on how are we going to spend our resources and tackle the most crucial issue. In my opinion, it is wiser to help the people who are suffering from global and major crisis
Fix the agreement mistake
crises
such
as world
hunger and diseases. It might be better to spend money on space related
Add a hyphen
space-related
researches
, once these Fix the agreement mistake
research
crisis
have been mostly resolved.Change the determiner
crises
Submitted by rizkyy.utama22 on
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Detailed Development
To further improve, you might want to deepen the discussion on each point by providing more specific examples and elaborating on how these examples support your opinions.
Balanced Perspective
Continuing to maintain a balanced perspective as you have done can enrich your essay. Consider exploring more diverse viewpoints for an even broader discussion.
Transitional Phrases
While your essay flows well, transitioning more smoothly between paragraphs would enhance its readability. You could achieve this by using a wider variety of transitional phrases.
Structure
You've structured your essay well, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
Balance
You made a commendable attempt at tackling both sides of the argument, showing a thoughtful consideration of the topic.
Use of Examples
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