Nowadays, the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development?
Nowadays,
technology
seems to be one of the most important parts of many peoples’
lives, especially the Correct your spelling
people’s
internet
. It changes the way people
interact with each other. The Internet
helps people
connect with others much more easily than in the past. On the other hand
, it isolates people
from their friends
and family. Both positive and negative sides will be discussed in the essay.
Undoubtedly, people
can communicate more easily by
Change preposition
with
internet
technology
. For example
, we can contact friends
who live in other countries on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, we can send messages to foreign clients through Email with files attached and it will be delivered instantly. For me, this
is a positive development in people
's relationships
.
However
, the internet
also
makes people
interact with their family and friends
less than they did in the past. Since they can make new friends
, watch movies, play games, search for information, and do many things on the internet
, they pay less attention to people
in real life. People
need to control themselves and not become addicted to the internet
because internet
addiction could have negative effects on their relationships
with others.
To sum up
, technology
has affected people
's relationships
in two ways. The positive effect of technology
is that people
around the world can communicate more easily, but if people
use the internet
too much, they would ignore others and this
is a negative effect on people
's relationships
.Submitted by nnatthinee on
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Task Achievement
Remember to maintain a balance of both sides of the argument throughout the essay, especially if the prompt asks for discussion of both positive and negative aspects.
Task Achievement
Consider enriching your essay with more varied examples and evidence to support your points. While the examples given are good, adding more variety could strengthen your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, try linking your ideas more cohesively through the use of transition words and phrases that connect paragraphs and sentences smoothly.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, supported by specific examples or explanations. This will make your arguments clearer and more persuasive.
Introduction
Your introduction provides a clear context for the topic and neatly sets up the discussion.
Balanced Argument
You have effectively addressed both sides of the issue, mentioning both positive and negative impacts of technology on relationships.
Conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of the essay, reinforcing your stance on the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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