Some people believe that eventually all jobs will be done by artificial intelligence robots. What is your opinion?

Thanks to the development of
technology
, which makes us more efficient to do many
jobs
. Is it true? Some people argue that all vacancies can be solved by the advance of technologies using
robots
.
However
, I believe that some
jobs
still require
humans
.
This
essay will describe the reasons deeply. It is true that the development of
technology
enable
Change the verb form
enables
show examples
humans
to replace some
jobs
. Risky
jobs
,
such
as firefighters or pilots are replaced using
robots
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because those
jobs
are dangerous and
robots
can do better.
Also
,
jobs
that need automation
such
as data processors can completed by
robots
. The opening of bank accounts,
nowadays
Add a missing verb
has nowadays
show examples
been replaced by machines to make them more fast and
also
efficient, nowadays become more common.
However
, a job that needs active interactions,
such
as teachers, or related decision making still needs
humans
.
Firstly
, it because related to many aspects of feelings.
For example
, to teach children in playgroup or elementary school, they need attention and understanding from their teacher, which can't replaced by
technology
.
Furthermore
,
jobs
related to decision-making,
such
as CEO of a company. Usually, to decide something they
also
need experiences and
also
considerations, which these didn't have by
robots
. These
robots
, only use algorithms that
programmed
Add a missing verb
are programmed
show examples
by the programmers to analyse past actions and not including the value of feelings,
such
as sad and happiness. In conclusion, the advance of
technology
indeed has brought many benefits to
humans
, including finishing tasks or assignments.
However
, I strongly believe that not all
jobs
can be replaced by machines, especially related to feelings and decisions.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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general
Your essay presents a clear opinion and discusses both the impact of technology on job replacement and the importance of human roles in specific careers. Enhancing your argument with more diversified examples and a wider range of linking phrases could make it more compelling.
coherence cohesion
Consider stronger topic sentences to better introduce each paragraph, enhancing clarity and directing the reader through your argument more fluidly.
task achievement
Incorporate more detailed and varied examples to enrich your argument, making it more persuasive and comprehensive.
introduction conclusion present
You effectively introduced and concluded your argument, providing a clear stance on the issue.
logical structure
Your essay is structured logically, with paragraphs dedicated to discussing different aspects of the topic.
supported main points
You provided clear main points supporting your opinion, showcasing a good understanding of the essay task.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Artificial Intelligence (AI)
  • Automation
  • Workplace automation
  • Human intuition
  • Job displacement
  • Collaborative robots (Cobots)
  • Skill adaptation
  • Ethical considerations
  • Economic implications
  • Fully automated workforce
  • Human-machine collaboration
  • Technological advancements
  • Creative industries
  • Empathy
  • Socio-economic impact
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