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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Regarding environmental issues, some people believe they are too vast for individuals to tackle. Conversely, others argue that these problems cannot be solved unless individuals take action. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #individuals #action
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Lowering the temperature rise caused by human activities on the planet must be stopped with the help of the authorities.
While
 the idea is supported by some sections of society, there are
also
 objections that argue that to address
this
 serious
issue
 and apply it,
people
 must take some action themselves. I agree with both arguments, and
this
 article will discuss the importance of each category in the following paragraphs to reduce
this
 important
issue
.
Firstly
, governments cannot only help reduce the extent of global warming by enforcing strict laws, but they can
also
 raise awareness among
people
 to minimize the problem. Elaborating
further
, the large-scale
use
 of fossil fuels by industries and the exhaust gases generated by
people
's heavy
use
 of private transportation can be stopped or reduced if authorities adopt strict laws against their overuse.
For example
, a recent survey showed that 40% of global pollution could be reduced to a minimum if society were to responsibly adhere to the laws and regulations promulgated.
In addition
, the government can organize publicity campaigns in both urban and rural areas to promote environmental protection through tree-planting initiatives.
Therefore
, soil erosion and climate change can be prevented in the long term.
However
, maintaining the Earth's climate is
also
 an individual responsibility. The first contribution that humans can make is to change their lifestyle habits. They must travel by public transport
instead
 of using their own vehicles.
This
 will reduce the levels of harmful exhaust gases that are detrimental to the atmosphere.
For example
,
people
 can
use
 public transportation
instead
 of cars for their daily commute.
Secondly
, we need to
use
 more biodegradable products worldwide to address the
issue
 of global warming.
Additionally
,
people
 may prefer items that can be recycled and reused within a specified time frame in the future.
Therefore
, adopting environmentally friendly behaviour can help to lower the Earth's surface temperature. All in all, after discussing both perspectives, it is clear to me that the authorities and the community must work simultaneously to address
this
 significant
issue
. The government and residents should take on the responsibility of addressing global warming and reconnecting with nature at various stages.
Submitted by yuqingchen10 on

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coherence cohesion
Consider creating more logically structured paragraphs by restating your main points in your conclusion to enhance the essay's overall clarity and ability to persuade.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your introduction and conclusion clearly state your stance on the topic, reflecting a full circle in your argument.
coherence cohesion
When supporting your main points, use a variety of sentence structures and linking words to create a sense of flow and connection between ideas.
task achievement
A complete response requires not only discussing both views fully but also clearly stating and supporting your own opinion throughout the essay, not just at the end.
task achievement
Make sure to develop clear and comprehensive ideas by expanding on your viewpoints with specific reasons, results, or consequences related to the prompt.
task achievement
Include more relevant and specific examples that support your argument; this will reinforce the validity of your claims and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic at hand.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental issues
  • sustainable habits
  • systemic industrial emissions
  • deforestation
  • sustainable operations
  • eco-friendly products
  • consumer demand
  • public advocacy
  • grassroots movements
  • legislative changes
  • conserve energy
  • reduce waste
  • recycling
  • supply chains
  • international cooperation
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