In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?
Nowadays an increasing number of
people
opt to stay at
their hometown and continue living with Change preposition
in
parents
during Correct pronoun usage
their parents
studies
Correct pronoun usage
their studies
instead
of moving to a different place to obtain a university degree. This
choice has a number of benefits and drawbacks, which will be discussed in this
essay.
Unlike students who live at their parenting home, many undergraduates prefer travel
to a different city or even country. An opportunity like Add the particle
to travel
this
offers various pros and cons. For instance
, some students strive to experience living in a new country, make international friends and see popular sightseeings
. Others would rather receive a proper degree from Fix the agreement mistake
sightseeing
top-ranked
high school and meet notorious professors all over the world. Correct article usage
a top-ranked
On the other hand
, young people
who have never been far away from the
Change the word
their
hometown
face severe difficulties Fix the agreement mistake
hometowns
such
as governmental bureaucracy, higher
expenses for accommodation, food and travelling there. They might feel lonely and miss their close relatives and friends as well. From my point of view, even though there are plenty of obstacles, it is definitely worth Correct word choice
and higher
to try
it, because for some undergraduates it can be once in a lifetime opportunity.
Others argue that studying at Change the verb form
trying
local
university allows scholars to save money. These Correct article usage
a local
people
do not have to spend monthly
allowance on everyday expenses, which makes Correct article usage
a monthly
cost
of living much more convenient. Despite the obvious appeal, local education may lack Add an article
the cost
a
proficiency or a suitable program that someone Correct article usage
the
looks
for. If a person lives in a small town, they could barely find a higher education facility within their region.
Wrong verb form
is looking
To sum up
, more and more apprentices have to choose whether they wish to receive an education at their local university or travel somewhere. Both options provide their benefits, such
as saving money and a close bond to
the family or meeting new friends and visiting cities. On the downside, these Change preposition
with
people
might not find a program they want or miss home being far away from it.Submitted by dulskywork on
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Coherence & Cohesion
To enhance your essay, consider using a variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more smoothly. This would help further improve the coherence and cohesion of your writing.
Task Response
Provide more specific examples to support your main points. Detailed examples add depth to your arguments and make your essay more convincing.
Introduction
Your introduction effectively outlines the subject and sets the stage for the discussion, showing a good grasp of the essay structure.
Balance of argument
You've done well to present both sides of the argument, maintaining a balanced discussion throughout your essay.
Conclusion
You successfully summarize your essay's key points in the conclusion, reinforcing your discussion effectively.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.