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Writing Samples /
Band 4

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

#minutes #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The graphs below demonstrate that in
San
Diego
,
California
 and the
res
Correct your spelling
rest
show examples
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the world the
water
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is utilized for
diffient
Correct your spelling
different
 purposes like Residential, Industry, and Agriculture.
Overall
, the pie graphs
demostrate
Correct your spelling
demonstrate
 in each location the
diffient
Correct your spelling
different
usage
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
water
. In
San
Diego
 County
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Residential
usage
 is of
most
Correct word choice
highest
show examples
 percentage. In
California
Add a comma
California,
show examples
 the
water
usage
 with the most percentage is
Residental
Correct your spelling
residential
show examples
 as well.
Finally
, worldwide Agriculture
is
Verb problem
has
show examples
 the highest percentage. The three locations have very different divisions regarding
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
water
usage
. Both in
San
Diego
 and
Woldwide
Correct your spelling
worldwide
their
Replace the word
there
show examples
 is a factor that has more than half of the
water
that is
 utilized.
Their
Replace the word
There
show examples
 is 23
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of the
water
, utilized for
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 Industrial purpose in
San
Diego
 and worldwide. When combing the three numbers shown
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Agriculture
usage
 is the highest factor that
water
 is used for. The only pie graph
wich
Correct your spelling
which
show examples
 is divided almost equally is in the location of
California
. In
worldwide
Correct article usage
the worldwide
show examples
 pie
graph
Add a comma
graph,
show examples
 it
show
Change the verb form
shows
show examples
 that the residential
usages
Fix the agreement mistake
usage
show examples
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 at 8
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. A third of the
water
that is
 used for an Industrial
porpuse
Correct your spelling
purposes
 is in the location of
California
.
Also
, more than half of the h20 used in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
San
Diego
 County is for
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
Residential use.
Submitted by patriciareyesfiguero on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear logical flow. It's good practice to use linking words or phrases to help the reader follow your argument.
Task Achievement
Be mindful of spelling and grammatical errors, especially with key terminology relevant to your topic. Small inaccuracies can distract from the overall quality.
Task Achievement
You effectively summarized the main features and made relevant comparisons where applicable.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion is well executed, contributing to a coherent and cohesive response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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