Some people argue that usage of technology (Mobile technology) is not helping for people to socialize Do you Agree or disagree?

#people #usage #technology

One of the most common ways to communicate in

this

world nowadays is through

phones

. A group of people argue that

this

type of technology is not beneficial for the population to socialize. I do not agree with

this

statement because

this

invention has several advantages , i will discuss both sides and relevant examples. Nowadays, interacting with citizens has become very convenient,

due to

invention

Correct article usage

the invention

show examples

of mobile

phones

. Decades ago one of the major problems that humanity struggled with was sending messages over far distances usually,

this

process had a massive delay and quick response was an imaginary subject,

however

, thanks to

this

method now is as simple as clicking on a few buttons.

Additionally

, accuracy has improved simultaneously because during transmission there are no items so distortion will be reduced to the lowest amount. I think these points make our lives much simpler and

as a result

, When we can communicate easily our social skills will develop respectively.

On the other hand

, just relying on

phones

and considering

this

way

as the main part will gradually impact our social skills because we can not feel those senses in the real world

also

that is

just an artificial and temporary

way

and to prevent

this

occurrence is better to stabilize the balance between physical and phone communication to be able to avoid the traps of Mentioned

way

of community between habitats. All in all, using mobile

phones

has increased and a group believe

this

way

is not positive,

however

, I think it is helpful and makes us interact with each other simply

also

it may have a drawback but by making balance through these real and artificial ways will introduce a new stage of communication between society

Submitted by soroushnorouzi0478 on Wed Apr 03 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement

Try to ensure a clear thesis statement in your introduction. Your position should be evident from the beginning.

Task Achievement

Incorporate more specific real-world examples to strengthen your argument and make your points more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion

Work on varying your sentence structures and using a wider range of vocabulary to enhance readability and engagement.

Coherence and Cohesion

Consider using clear paragraphing to signal changes in ideas or arguments. Each paragraph should contain a single idea, supported by examples or explanations.

Task Achievement

You effectively discuss the advantages and disadvantages of mobile technology, showing a balanced approach.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay follows a logical structure, with each paragraph focusing on a different aspect of the argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

288 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
As time goes by, some countries are developed as fast as lightning. However, it seems that there are also some poor countries which unable to be well developed and it might due to financial problem. This will cause wealthy nations often donate money to less developed nations, yet this does not end poverty. Therefore, despite providing financial aid, wealthier nations ought provide help in the other ways to developing nations. In my opinion, developed countries should utilize other non-motery measures including educational opportunities to eradicate poverty.
6.5
band
Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your experiences.
In the contemporary globalized world, the debate over the optimal age for children to commence learning a foreign language has become a subject of considerable discussion. While some argue that primary school is the most suitable stage, others contend that waiting until secondary school offers distinct advantages. In my opinion, the benefits of starting early outweigh the drawbacks.
5.5
band
It is the responsibility of schools to teach children good behavior in addition to provide formal education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
No one doubts that school education plays a significant role in people’s life. People who receive good education and behave themselves properly in the society are highly appreciated and recognized. Some people argue that schools should be responsible not only for the decent behavior of students but also for providing academic education. In the following essay I will discuss this statement from my perspective.
5.5
band
Plagiarism in academics has become a pressing problem in many countries today. What are the causes of this problem? What are some possible solutions?
Many are concerned with the current state of plagiarism in universities and academic fields. In this essay, I would argue that the root causes of this phenomenon might be the unrealistic expectations tutors have of the students as well as peer pressure that may exist. To tackle this issue, lowering what the teachers are expecting of their learners is vital, and further trying to develop a fashion of hardworking and persistence and deterring jealousy could be fruitful in combating falsification.
7.5
band
Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion?
As for graduates of the school, being enrolled in the University or Colleges adds a value to their life. It is often argued that this is a positive way, whilst others disagree and think that it will lead to adverse ramifications. This essay agrees that an academic education is beneficial to graduates. This essay will discuss both points of view.

Some people argue that usage of technology (Mobile technology) is not helping for people to socialize Do you Agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your experiences.

It is the responsibility of schools to teach children good behavior in addition to provide formal education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Plagiarism in academics has become a pressing problem in many countries today. What are the causes of this problem? What are some possible solutions?

Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion?