IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The US film industry has too much influence on the film industry around the world. Governments have a duty to invest money in their own film industries to protect and develop their cultures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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There is no doubt that Hollywood and other American entertainment companies are long-lasting leaders in the film industry. Many countries develop special local programs to financially support new series or film productions. I strongly believe, that
such
Linking Words
 a policy should be an obligation for governments, it is crucial to support the cultural identity and promote the
country
Use synonyms
's life through the most popular entertainment resource. The first point to consider is that films usually promote the cultural code of the
country
Use synonyms
 where they were directed and made.
For example
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, the most popular series "Friends" shows the
day
Replace the word
daily
show examples
 life of a group of people with specific habits, jokes and behaviour.
Moreover
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, there are hiding advertisements that work well
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 young generations.
As a result
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, millions of fans from Russia to China want to be like those characters. Another argument that supports the idea of spending money on a local cinema production is to show the specific vibe and life approach which are related to the local region and to promote it within the
country
Use synonyms
 or even globally in case of success. It has been proved that more than eighty per cent of information related to the specific
country
Use synonyms
 people get from series or films.
Therefore
Linking Words
, governments should use
this
Linking Words
 tool to advertise culture among citizens and foreigners.
To conclude
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, I would like to say that
while
Linking Words
 American film-making companies are doing a great job,
moreover
Linking Words
 they provide quality content. I strongly believe that the governments should do their best to support local directors and producers to promote the identity and the lifestyle of their countries.

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task achievement
Ensure that all ideas are fully developed to enhance clarity and understanding.
coherence cohesion
Work on using linking words more fluidly for better coherence.
task achievement
Consider developing counter-arguments to strengthen the response.
task achievement
The essay provides a relevant example with 'Friends,' which effectively ties into the main argument about cultural influence.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively outline and wrap up your argument.
task achievement
You maintain a clear focus on the topic throughout the essay without deviating from the main argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Americanisation
  • Cultural imperialism
  • Local cinema
  • Cultural diversity
  • Cultural homogenization
  • Film subsidies
  • National identity
  • Artistic expression
  • Blockbusters
  • Cultural preservation
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