IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

You need a website for your business, and you would like to ask your friend to build it. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter •Include a brief description of your business •Explain what you would like to have on the website •Provide some ideas on the use of images on the website.

#website #business #friend #•include #description #•explain #•provide #images
Dear Sam, I’m writing
this
 letter to let you know that I want to create a website for my business. Recently, I constructed a building for my business purposes. Before starting to explain about design of the webpage, I will provide some information about my shop. Since our childhood, you have known me well that very keen on technology. So, I started a business regarding automation devices. In my shop, you can find a tremendous number of gadgets, starting from mobile phones to gaming computers.
Furthermore
, I have discussed
this
 with many people, and they provided
mewith asuggestion
Correct your spelling
me with suggestions
 to start selling devices online.
Hence
, to generate an online page, I need to mention all of my products on that website with special graphic design. Apart from that, it
also
 includes a payment gateway.
As a result
, the customer can complete their payment online.
Finally
, I would like to share some of my personal touches on
this
 website pattern.
First,
I have gathered some pictures from the supplier’s online pages.
Therefore
, I want to use the same images on my web portal. Please, don’t worry about the copyright issue because I already got their permission to upload the image. I hope you can understand my ideas, and looking forward to hearing from you soon. All the best, Kumar
Submitted by jeeveshkb22 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure to use transitions and connectors to improve flow between ideas.
Grammar
Review for small grammatical errors to enhance clarity.
Task Achievement
Consider expanding on how specific features of the website will benefit your business.
Task Achievement
You provided a clear description of your business and what you intend for the website, which is excellent for task achievement.
Tone
Your letter has a friendly and appropriate tone throughout, fitting the context of writing to a friend.
Coherence and Cohesion
The structure of your letter is well-organized, making your points easy to follow.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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