IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Psychological illnesses may not be as obvious as physical disabilities or illnesses. Nevertheless, they are just as disabling in their own way. Society, however, is more accepting of those with physical than psychological illnesses or disabilities, The latter being regarded as a taboo subject sometimes. To what extent do you agree with this view?

#illnesses #disabilities #society #latter
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Dear Tom, Thank you for sending me an email, I’m very pleased to hear from you. Sorry for not writing
you
Change preposition
to you
show examples
 for a long time, I was very busy. I’m very glad that you had fun in the
museum
Use synonyms
. I don’t go to museums with my class because no one wants to
got
Correct your spelling
go
show examples
 there. My
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
museum
Use synonyms
 that I have been
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 is the Lamborghini
Use synonyms
museum
Capitalize word
Museum
show examples
 in Italy, Bologna. I had an amazing time in that
museum
Use synonyms
! People should go there to have a look at some of the best cars in the world! You mentioned that you are going hiking with your parents
this
Linking Words
 summer. Where exactly are you going hiking? For how long are you going to hike? What are you going to bring with
yourself
Correct pronoun usage
you
show examples
? I have got to go now, I have some unfinished business to deal with. Write me back soon! Your dear friend, Vik
Submitted by dulskywork on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
The provided text does not address the IELTS essay question about psychological illnesses vs. physical disabilities. It appears to be a personal letter, not an essay on the given topic. Consider focusing on the topic, developing arguments, and providing examples relevant to the subject matter.
coherence cohesion
The letter is well-structured with clear paragraphs, each dealing with a different topic. However, for essay tasks, remember to structure your response with an introduction, body paragraphs that develop your arguments with examples, and a conclusion that summarizes or restates your position.
coherence cohesion
When discussing a topic like the one given, use examples and evidence to support your points. While the letter shares a personal experience visiting a museum, for the essay, focus on societal attitudes towards psychological and physical illnesses or disabilities.
coherence cohesion
The letter demonstrates a clear structure in terms of paragraphs, making it easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: