Some people think that social networking sites have a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #sites #impact #individuals #society

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There is a school of thought that social media

platforms

exert significant adverse effects on both

individuals

and

society

. From my perspective, I agree with

this

opinion to some extent. On one hand, social networking sites undeniably offer numerous advantages to

individuals

, fostering a broader sense of community.

Firstly

, they serve as a conduit for continuous updates on global affairs, including political developments and financial trends.

Moreover

, they facilitate maintaining familial connections and even fostering new relationships.

Lastly

, they serve as invaluable

platforms

for expanding one's knowledge and skills through the sharing of useful information and access to free educational resources, thereby enhancing career prospects.

However

, the flip side of the coin reveals that social media

platforms

can

harbor

Change the spelling

harbour

show examples

substantial detrimental consequences for both

individuals

and

society

at large.

Firstly

, the ubiquitous dissemination of information on these

platforms

often blurs the line between truth and falsehood, leading

individuals

to engage

with

Change preposition

show examples

misleading or fabricated content.

Furthermore

, the ease of connectivity can expose users to various risks,

such

as falling victim to scams or unwittingly engaging in illegal activities. Notably, the pervasive phenomenon of peer pressure among the younger demographic can be directly attributed to the influence of social media

platforms

. Alarmingly, recent reports indicate a significant surge in mental health issues among young people, with the prevalence more than doubling over the past decade. With all of the aforementioned theses and explanations, the conclusion is self-evident. I believe that social networking sites can originally assist humans and

society

;

however

, they bring far more significant harm to both

individuals

and

society

Submitted by lethithut123 on Fri Apr 05 2024

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Task Achievement

Support your arguments with more specific examples or data to enhance the clarity and persuasiveness of your points.

Coherence & Cohesion

Consider the use of linking phrases to enhance the flow between sentences and paragraphs, further improving coherence.

Task Achievement

Keep developing your ideas thoroughly but remember to stay focused to maintain relevance to the question posed.

Coherence & Cohesion

Regularly practice summarizing your arguments in the conclusion more strongly to leave a lasting impact on the reader.

Coherence & Cohesion

You introduced and concluded your essay effectively, guiding the reader through your argument.

Coherence & Cohesion

You maintained a logical structure throughout the essay, which aided in conveying your argument clearly.

Task Achievement

Your essay addressed the topic thoroughly, presenting a balanced view which effectively answers the question.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

social isolation
virtual interactions
mental health
feelings of inadequacy
anxiety
depression
misinformation
destabilize
privacy concerns
data breaches
productivity
foster connections
educational content
social activism

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Some people think that social networking sites have a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

in some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can learn. opportunities.

In some countries, there is not enough recycling of waste materials (e.g. paper, glass, and cans). What are the reasons and what can be done to solve this problem?

Several people assert that the main cause of crime is an economically disadvantaged background. However, others say that crime is caused by a person's nature. Discuss both ideas and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that in order to give opportunities to new generation companies should encourage high level employess who are older than 55 to retire. Do you agree or disagree? Why.

Some people think that it is more important to spend money on roads and motorways than on public transport system such as railways and trams. To what extend do you agree or disagree?