Some people are happy to spend their whole life in the same area, others prefer to live in many different places in thair life time? Discuss boyh views & give your opinion

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In
the
Correct article usage
apply
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recent years, there has been a lot of migration of
people
around the globe in
search
of greener pastures.
However
, relocation is not for everyone, there are some
people
who do not want to hear about all that, they prefer living their lives in a single place for the rest of their life. In
this
essay, I will discuss both sides and provide evidence on why I believe moving to other
places
is important. On the one hand. we have a group of
people
who are scared to leave their
places
of birth in
search
of a better life
elsewhere
. They are afraid of changing environments because they are used to their own type of lifestyle and they are afraid to move to new
places
where they would want to start learning and adapting to new lifestyles.
On the other hand
, there is a growing number of
people
who are not content with their local environment. These
people
are seen travelling from one place to another for different reasons,
for instance
, in
search
of good climatic conditions. We have seen a number of Europeans moving to Africa just to experience the good weather.
Additionally
,
Chinese
Correct article usage
the Chinese
show examples
are relocating to Africa in
search
of raw materials and mining minerals.
Furthermore
, the biggest number of these travellers are tourists. They only travel for the love of exploration of scenic
places
. In conclusion, it is important for
people
to travel and explore new
places
rather than stay in one place for the rest of their lives. They will be missing a lot,
this
world is for everyone to experience its beautiful flora and fauna.
Submitted by sisalt100 on

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examples/detail
To further improve, try fleshing out your examples with more detail and specificity. While you've mentioned Europeans moving to Africa and Chinese involvement in mining, deeper explanations or more vivid descriptions would make your arguments stronger and more engaging.
opinion clarity
Consider introducing a more explicit statement of your own opinion in the introduction, followed by a more thorough exploration of this viewpoint in a separate paragraph, to enhance task achievement.
sentence variety
Remember, variety in sentence structure can enhance the readability and engagement of your essay. While your essay has a good flow, experimenting with complex sentences or varied sentence beginnings could enhance coherence and cohesion.
balanced discussion
You did a great job providing a balanced discussion of both views on living in one place versus moving around. Your essay reflects an understanding of different perspectives.
effective conclusion
Your conclusion succinctly summarises your opinion and underscores the importance of exploring new places, effectively reinforcing the message of your essay.
logical structure
The logical structure of your argument is clear, making it easy for the reader to follow your line of reasoning from introduction through to conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Familiarity
  • Stability
  • Security
  • Cultural roots
  • Financial strain
  • Diverse experiences
  • Flexibility
  • Growth
  • Career opportunities
  • Curiosity
  • Adventure
  • Perspective
  • Merit
  • Home base
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