Some people believe that children should study all subjects at school, while others think they should only study subjects they are good at or find interesting. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
While
Linking Words
some claim that
children
Use synonyms
ought to
study
Use synonyms
all
subjects
Use synonyms
in the class at
school
Use synonyms
, others believe that they are only interested in
favourite
Use synonyms
subjects
Use synonyms
. From my point of view, both of the given arguments have their merits but I would lean toward the former. On the one hand, one appealing reason why the pupils should
study
Use synonyms
all
subjects
Use synonyms
at
school
Use synonyms
is because of the dramatical requirement of educational qualification and the demand for employment, the pupils currently ought to
study
Use synonyms
all
subjects
Use synonyms
in the class in order to broaden their general knowledge.
This
Linking Words
is because it is undeniable that studying plays an important role in setting up an advanced career for
children
Use synonyms
in the future. Owings to
this
Linking Words
, the
children
Use synonyms
ought to
study
Use synonyms
all
subjects
Use synonyms
at
school
Use synonyms
in order to absorb basic insights. After that, they can
study
Use synonyms
other higher qualifications
such
Linking Words
as high
school
Use synonyms
, and university easily.
For example
Linking Words
, The USA, which is the most cutting-edge country in educating
students
Use synonyms
from the beginning, usually focuses on teaching in class and ultimately becomes a rich country with high-quality human resources.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, other people claim that studying
favourite
Use synonyms
subjects
Use synonyms
will decrease stress for
students
Use synonyms
and create interesting stimulation in studying. The reason is that it is true that the most
favourite
Use synonyms
subjects
Use synonyms
children
Use synonyms
always attract miracles and concentration on studying.
In addition
Linking Words
, these
favourite
Use synonyms
subjects
Use synonyms
not only stimulate creative things in studying
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
Linking Words
decreases
Correct subject-verb agreement
decrease
show examples
stress for the
students
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
of studying all
subjects
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, In Vietnam, many high schools always encourage their
students
Use synonyms
to choose their
favourite
Use synonyms
field from entering the
school
Use synonyms
to graduating, resulting in a positive classification in the job market. In conclusion, there are reasons why
students
Use synonyms
should
study
Use synonyms
their
favourite
Use synonyms
subjects
Use synonyms
, but in my opinion, studying all
subjects
Use synonyms
will be a crucial foundation in the life of the student after graduation.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence
Ensure each paragraph presents clear and distinct ideas. While discussing differing views is commendable, bringing out a vivid contrast will enhance clarity.
Task response
Develop your examples further to strengthen your arguments. Specific, real-world instances make your points more persuasive and comprehensible.
Language accuracy
Try to address any grammatical or spelling errors. Occasional mistakes can detract from the overall quality of your essay. Proofreading can help avoid these minor issues.
Content
You've managed a well-balanced discussion of both views, showcasing an understanding of the topic.
Structure
The essay possesses a good logical structure, making it easier for the reader to follow your arguments.
Use of examples
Providing examples, such as the education system in the USA and Vietnam, serves well to support your points.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • well-rounded education
  • discover their interests and strengths
  • basic understanding
  • interconnected world
  • higher motivation
  • deeper knowledge
  • mental health
  • reducing unnecessary stress
  • boredom
  • balanced approach
  • successful specialization
  • well-informed perspective
  • solid general education
  • freedom to delve deeper
  • specialized future career path
What to do next:
Look at other essays: