Many people no longer read newspapers or watch TV news programmes. Instead they get news about the world from the Internet. Is this a positive or negative development?

It has become more and more ubiquitous/pervasive
seeking
Change the verb form
to seek
show examples
worlds
Change the noun form
world
show examples
news
online
instead
of delving
news
Change preposition
into news
show examples
from newspapers and
news
shows on TV.
This
evolution gives us some benefits but
also
some drawbacks.
This
essay will explore the underlying causes behind and elucidate with examples.
Firstly
,
this
technology
Replace the word
technological
show examples
innovation has
made
Verb problem
increased
show examples
our
accessible
Replace the word
access
show examples
to
news
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content
show examples
facilitate
Verb problem
apply
show examples
. Nowadays, information can easily be obtained through our
laptop
Fix the agreement mistake
laptops
show examples
,
smartphone
Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
show examples
, and
tablet
Fix the agreement mistake
tablets
show examples
.
For example
,
instead
of waiting for
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
to come to our houses or getting home to dial channels to watch
news
programmes, we can easily acquire the latest
news
quickly and easily.
Additionaly
Correct your spelling
Additionally
this
form of getting
news
is much more eco than wasting
papers
Fix the agreement mistake
paper
show examples
. I think
this
positive aspect has given us an incredible innovation
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
our lives.
On the other hand
, there are some disadvantages in relying on digital
form
Fix the agreement mistake
forms
show examples
of
news
obtainment. Because of
this
easiness, there are large amount of information
acrossing
Correct your spelling
across
the
worlds
Fix the agreement mistake
world
show examples
. even
it
Correct word choice
if it
show examples
is not a
news
site, anyone can post wolds
news
on social media, which can be taken with caution because of its
reliabiliness
Correct your spelling
reliability
.
For example
, people often post fake
news
online, and because of its accecibiliness, it
prones
Correct your spelling
proves
prone
to spread
quicly
Correct your spelling
quickly
, many people end up
beliving
Correct your spelling
believing
show examples
the
news
which is not true.
This drawbacks
Change the determiner
This drawback
These drawbacks
show examples
shoud
Correct your spelling
should
be taken as a caution when we obtain
news
from
sucn
Correct your spelling
such
sun
plat forms
Correct your spelling
platforms
show examples
. In
concussion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
show examples
, the evolution of
Correct article usage
the acceibility
show examples
acceibility
Correct your spelling
accessibility
of
obting
Correct your spelling
obtaining
news
is
abcolutely
Correct your spelling
absolutely
amaxing
Correct your spelling
amazing
.
however
,
onlie
Correct your spelling
online
can be a dangerous place to obtain
news
because there are many fake
news
. If we keep it in
our
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
mind,
this
evolution
is
Verb problem
has
show examples
absolutely
Add an article
an absolutely
the absolutely
show examples
positive impact on our lives.
Submitted by chia.8ee on

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coherence cohesion
Excellent job structuring your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. To enhance coherence, consider varying your transitional phrases to link ideas more smoothly. For instance, use 'Furthermore,' 'In contrast,' or 'Therefore' to guide the reader through your argument.
task achievement
Your ideas are generally relevant and answer the prompt directly. Consider developing your examples further to make your points more vivid. For example, when you mention the eco-friendly advantage of digital news, you could elaborate on the environmental impact of reducing paper consumption.
general
Be mindful of spelling, grammar, and accuracy in word choice (e.g., 'accecibiliness' should be 'accessibility', 'amaxing' should be 'amazing'). Frequent errors can make your argument less clear. It's always a good idea to proofread your essay for these small inaccuracies.
content
You made an effective effort to discuss both the positive and negative aspects of obtaining news online, which shows a balanced approach.
structure
Your introduction and conclusion were clear and directly addressed the essay topic, providing a good frame for your argument.
examples
The use of examples, even if they could be expanded upon, helped to concrete your arguments and made your essay more engaging.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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