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Band 5.5

Too many historic buildings are in danger and destroyed in many countries. What are the main reasons? How to protect them?

#buildings #danger #countries
Monuments of historic significance are damaged or even attacked in several countries. It is caused by a plethora of reasons. These can be protected by authorities and
general
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the general
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 public by following various means.
To begin
 with, historic sites exhibit remains of the bygone eras.
Thus
, in some nations, political leaders or violent organizations try to demolish
such
 places to reduce their importance. These places belong to those leaders who follow a different political ideology and they do not want that the public should be reminded of their legacies. Apparently, these situations happen in non-democratic countries.
For instance
, in the country of Syria, numerous buildings were attacked by terrorists that demonstrate other religious beliefs or those which symbolized pillars of
the
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apply
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democracy.
Coversely
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Conversely
, these places should be protected using various techniques. Primarily, these monuments can be turned into a library for
students
. An educational authority can take responsibility
of
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for
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 that place to maintain it and to preserve it for future generations.
For instance
,
government
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the government
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 can make
an
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a
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 university near to that monument to increase
curiosity
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the curiosity
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 of
students
 to visit it and
also
 to read books that are related to
history
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the history
show examples
 of that site.
Consequently
,
students
 will be encouraged to take
interest
Correct article usage
an interest
show examples
 in it and they will work to progress in that direction. In conclusion, historic architecture acts as
site
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a site
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 of cultural heritage depiction and developments done by ancestors. So, these should be saved from
rule
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the rule
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 of
tyrrany
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tyranny
 who wants to destroy them. These buildings have to be converted into libraries or museums to generate
interest
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the interest
show examples
 of
students
 and
masses
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the masses
show examples
.
Submitted by Kiran on

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Vocabulary Enrichment
Make sure to diversify your language by using a wider range of vocabulary related to the topic. This can help enhance your score in the lexical resource criterion.
Cohesive Devices Usage
You could improve the flow and clarity of your ideas by utilizing a wider range of cohesive devices. Although your essay is easy to follow, using phrases like 'Furthermore', 'In addition to', or 'Moreover' can add depth to your linking of ideas.
Content Development
Try to explore multiple viewpoints or solutions in your essays to demonstrate a comprehensive understanding of the topic. Providing contrasting opinions or a variety of solutions before concluding can enrich your content.
Structure
You have structured your essay well, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
Use of Examples
The use of relevant examples such as the situation in Syria to support your points was effective in enhancing the credibility of your essay.
Innovative Solutions
You offered a clear, relevant, and innovative solution by proposing the conversion of historic sites into educational facilities, which shows a good level of critical thinking.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • rapid urbanization
  • residential developments
  • structural integrity
  • financial constraints
  • irreversible damage
  • legislation
  • cultural importance
  • collaboration
  • conservation
  • public awareness
  • technological advancements
  • preservation techniques
What to do next:
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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