Some people think that the amounts of money used for space exploration are not justified. To what extent do you agree?

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People tend to think that scientists wasting money on exploring the
planet
systems, rather than exploring the
planet
we live on.
Also
, space exploration is not done easily it needs huge investments to discover the things that are far beyond our solar system.
However
, these discoveries can bring a lot of solutions to current issues on earth and the resources in the form of money should not be questioned.
For example
, climate change is destroying some parts of the earth and nobody knows what consequences
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
holds. In
this
matter, space discoveries might offer us a better place to occupy , but beforehand some
reasearch
Correct your spelling
research
has to be done.
Planet
Correct article usage
The planet
show examples
system holds a lot of unknown secrets , we might have been missing
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
due to
the lack of advances in technology.
For example
, we still do not know whether there are any other
planet
systems than the solar system.
This
information might help us to contact with more advanced living forms and cause
overall
development in all spheres.
For example
, other than climate issues , we
also
have some deadly viruses which can cause
epidemias
Correct your spelling
epidemics
, in
this
term more advanced “aliens” might help us to combat by bringing their technology. In conclusion, space investments are justified for the solutions
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
might give us
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
global warming and lack of technological advances.
Submitted by alexareptile on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay presents a unique perspective on space exploration and its potential benefits. To improve coherence and cohesion, consider organizing your ideas more clearly. Start each paragraph with a topic sentence that outlines the main idea you will discuss.
Task Achievement
You've incorporated examples to support your points, which is great. However, more detailed explanation of these examples and how they directly relate to the thesis could enhance the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas.
Language Accuracy
Pay attention to minor grammatical errors and spelling mistakes, as these can impact the flow and clarity of your argument. Proofreading your essay can help to minimize these inaccuracies.
Task Achievement
You have successfully addressed the topic and provided a reasoned argument, demonstrating your ability to tackle complex issues.
Coherence and Cohesion
The conclusion succinctly wraps up your argument, showing you understand the importance of a coherent wrap-up to an essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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