Some students prefer to take a gap year between high school and university, to work or travel. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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In
this
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fast-paced society,
while
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the educational
gap
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broadens many graduates’ appeal, others have an adverse opinion. From my perspective, taking a
gap
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year
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before attending university has more drawbacks than benefits. On the one hand,
this
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trend has become more and more popular because of the upsides it brings to people.
To begin
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with, it is the time for high school graduates to enhance their academic studies.
For example
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, IELTS, and TOEFL certificates are essential for individuals to get promoted in various fields, so
this
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transitional phase is a valuable chance for them to focus on study in order to get high band scores. Another positive side of
this
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tendency is in terms of emotional balance.
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, after 12 years of studying stressfully, graduating seniors can step out of their comfort zones by travelling to other places to explore
as well as
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develop a deeper understanding of themselves. It can be seen that many good points are given by the
gap
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year
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.
On the other hand
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,
gap
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period takers may be in the face of several challenges.
First,
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students may waste their precious time on aimless experiences.
Instead
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of continuing higher study in universities or colleges, graduates opt for staying at home with their vague plans about the career path. The second highlight is that it is more complicated for individuals to come back after an academic hiatus because of missing opportunities so they feel less motivated.
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but not least, they may be impacted by financial constraints. In fact, no matter what purpose students decide to take a bridge
year
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, they may have to deal with the hassle of the burden of money
such
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as tuition, and travelling fees. In conclusion,
although
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taking a time-out after graduating high school offers some advantages
such
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as getting the necessary skills and balancing emotions, it presents more adverse influences including academic delay, motivation loss and financial strains.
Thus
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, it is crucial for people to consider the nature of
gap
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year
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and its potential consequences before engaging in
this
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tendency.
Submitted by bichngoc.ngochoa on

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Task Achievement
Your essay presents a well-structured argument and thoughtfully examines both sides of the gap year debate, however, integrating more specific examples and details could make your points more convincing and vivid.
Coherence and Cohesion
To enhance coherence, ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus and that transitions between paragraphs and ideas are smooth. This will help in creating a more cohesive argument.
Introduction and Conclusion
Your introductory and concluding paragraphs effectively frame the debate, clearly stating your position and summarizing the key arguments.
Logical Structure
The essay demonstrates a good balance between discussing advantages and disadvantages, maintaining a logical structure throughout.
Supported Main Points
You have made an effort to support your main points with explanations, albeit more specific examples could strengthen your argument.
Complete Response
Your essay comprehensively addresses the topic, presenting a clear and impactful argument on the merits and drawbacks of taking a gap year.
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