Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.

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Countless
of
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apply
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innocent
lives
have perished in
third world
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third-world
show examples
countries every day. Common diseases that can be remedied are taking away
lives
due to
the fact that these people are unable to afford
drugs
Correct article usage
the drugs
show examples
they require. In my essay, I will delve into why I believe that pharmaceutical
companies
should reduce their
price
tag for
drugs
being sold to poorer
nations
and provide my explanations for them.
To begin
, citizens of poor countries are dying at an alarming rate
due to
curable diseases. These common diseases, like flu, are curable by simple medication which is how people of richer countries
are dealing
Wrong verb form
deal
show examples
with them on a day-to-day basis. The
price
of
drugs
makes even the most common disease seem like a death sentence.
However
, despite
this
sad plight, no action has been taken by these large multinational pharmaceutical
companies
to reduce the
price
of
drugs
that are being supplied to those poorer
nations
due to
the fear of negative financial implications.
For example
, it is reported by Fox News that the American company
of
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apply
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Pfizer has refused to reduce the
price
as they are concerned with their share prices at the stock market if their products are associated with cheap rates. Adding on, I believe,
at
Correct word choice
that at
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the heart of a pharmaceutical corporation, helping people should be helm as an utmost priority above profits.
By allowing
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Allowing
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their drug products to be sold cheaper, will help save many millions of
lives
. As a bonus,
this
action will most certainly help build their reputation status.
For instance
, in 2008, a pilot project led by Singaporean drug company, Reddot, sold their
drugs
at an incredible discount of 90%,
into
Change preposition
to
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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poorer
nations
like Senegal and Tongo to aid them fight off their mosquito season which took away half a million
lives
in the previous year.
This
project, received applause from various governments across the globe, especially in the home country of Singapore, which injected one million dollars into the company as an amount to
pledge
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pledge to
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support the project. In conclusion, I believe that
lives
are more important than profit margins for
companies
that are afraid of being
labeled
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labelled
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cheap. Reduced rates of selling
drugs
especially
Add the comma(s)
, especially
show examples
to those who really need them is vital in saving
lives
.
Therefore
, I encourage all drug
companies
across the world to step in and save
lives
, especially
for
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apply
show examples
those in poorer
nations
.
Submitted by chubbybunny on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Continue to structure your essay with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion, as you've done, ensuring a logical flow throughout.
Style
Consider varying your sentence structures and using synonyms to enhance the readability and impact of your writing.
Task Achievement
To improve task achievement, work on deepening your analysis and providing even more specific examples or data to support your points.
Task Achievement
You provided a clear stance on the issue and backed it up with relevant examples.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a good logical structure, making your arguments easy to follow.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Pharmaceuticals
  • Generic drugs
  • Patent laws
  • Healthcare disparity
  • Subsidies
  • Non-Governmental Organizations (NGOs)
  • Intellectual property
  • Epidemiology
  • Affordability
  • Global health initiatives
  • Corporate social responsibility
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