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Band 4

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?

#people #experimentation #animals #discoveries #experiments #alternatives
In recent years, scientific discoveries and experimentation
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 been revolutionised especially
due to
 advancements in modern technology and much of the research being conducted on
animals
. Opinions from the general public might view these experiments as barbaric towards wildlife with some seeing it as a justifiable cause, l stand with
latter
Correct article usage
the latter
show examples
 and
this
 essay will look
further
 into why it is
arguebly
Correct your spelling
arguably
 a
benefical
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 act. On one hand, people have grown fond towards
animals
 and their ecological importance
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the environment
as well as
 human life is left
unoticed
Correct your spelling
unnoticed
.
Firstly
,
them
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
being
Add a missing verb
are being
show examples
 perceived in a friendly manner as seen
some
Change preposition
in some
show examples
 of them being domesticated and preserved in zoos just to protect
from
Correct pronoun usage
them from
show examples
 going extinct
for example
 protection of elephants and
rhinoes
Correct your spelling
rhinos
 from
pouchers
Correct your spelling
poachers
pouches
 who hunt them for their horns . In
additition
Correct your spelling
addition
, other individuals
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
even state their
animals
 on their will
for example
 Oprah Wifrey ,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is said
that
Change preposition
to
show examples
 she left
inheritants
Correct your spelling
inheritance
 to her dogs .
Nonetheless
,
animals
 may be kept for domestic
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
and agriculture thereby mankind will not allow
scientifics
Correct your spelling
scientists
 to
use
 them
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 scared of
existicting
Correct your spelling
existing
 of the species.
Therefore
, humans opt to
use
supliment
Correct your spelling
supplement
supplements
such
 as dead people or air
instead
 of creatures.
On the other hand
 , it is very easy to
use
animals
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 experiments its a doable process and
its
Correct your spelling
it is
show examples
 easy to detect any
disiease
Correct your spelling
disease
 since they can be exposed to any kind of pathogens.
Sometime
Correct your spelling
Sometimes
show examples
,
its
Correct your spelling
it's
show examples
 very
difficulty
Replace the word
difficult
show examples
 to find a person to practice on
therefore
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 a wise decision to
use
animals
 the procedure
maybe
Correct your spelling
may be
show examples
 scary no one can volunteer .
To sum up
 ,
animals
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
usually do not have a long life . unlike
huma
Correct your spelling
human
 beings. In conclusion, other people are saying
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 bad to
use
animals
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 experiments and it should be lawed as they see them as pets and for domestic
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
show examples
whilst others are
sayings its
Correct your spelling
saying it's
show examples
 important to
use
 them since
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 easy to do the procedure and very easy to access. In my own
opionion
Correct your spelling
opinion
Add a comma
,
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will choose later .
Submitted by teterayithelma on

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coherence cohesion
Strengthen coherence by presenting ideas in a structured manner. Start with an introductory sentence for each paragraph that outlines its main idea.
coherence cohesion
Enhance cohesion by using a variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Improve clarity by revisiting sentence structure and grammar. Aim for sentences that are easier to follow.
task achievement
Clarify your position by directly addressing the question in the introduction and reinforcing it in the conclusion.
task achievement
To better develop your arguments, include more specific examples and elaborate on how they support your point of view.
task achievement
You have addressed both perspectives of the argument.
task achievement
Clearly expressed personal stance on the issue.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • scientific breakthroughs
  • ethical concerns
  • alternatives
  • animal testing
  • moral implications
  • ethical considerations
  • vivisection
  • research methods
  • ethical dilemmas
  • animal welfare
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